IDS #249 - It's A Long Way To The Top If You Can't Play The Bagpipes

A storm rips part of Mike’s house off.
 One contractor says “no problem.”
 Another says “impossible.”

And that’s only the first story.

In Episode 249 of Irritable Dad Syndrome, the dads cover home repair nightmares, wildly different contractor approaches, and why you don’t cheap out on your roof. Darin meets Mike Farris at a concert, Mike witnesses a truly cursed live bagpipe performance, and somehow that leads to stories about kids’ school recitals, music snobbery, Facebook arguments, and suspicious book club behavior.

Also inside:

• Disney vacation budgeting stress
• The “you’re gonna want to…” method of trip planning
• Why beachfront hotels suddenly make sense in your 40s
• Breaking Bad lying analysis
• Game of Thrones reading fatigue
• The social media danger of declaring a “favorite” song

Homeownership chaos, live music highs and lows, dad brain spirals, and vacation money denial.

Just another week at IDS.

#ComedyPodcast #DadHumor #HomeRepair #LiveMusic #VacationPlanning #DisneyTrip #GenXHumor #IrritableDadSyndrome

Transcript

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Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast

>> Mike: Poobler. It's your Poobler.

>> Darin: with your tubler. What the, hell. When you're with the poop m. Have a gay old time. We need to start the podcast. YouTube.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: You may need to surgically excise some of that. And I think.

>> Darin: I think I will.

>> Mike: Do you know what?

>> Darin: Thank you for telling me how to.

>> Mike: That's editing 101. Well, when you going to start? Oh, that's where the duck comes in. And Dave Lee goes, wow, that was a, That's why we need the third guy here is like Jesus, Mike. Gentlemen, what do you think you should get in your corner. There are no bad ideas limit.

>> Darin: Only great ideas that go horribly wrong.

>> Dave: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome. Find a better podcast. We'll buy it. Now, here are your hosts, Mike and Darren.

>> Darin: Hi, I'm Darren and Mike. Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast. This is episode 249.

>> Mike: Holy Lord. Do we have a show for you tonight? Yes, I'm actually excited.

>> Darin: Yeah. Last week's show was nothing compared to what we got for you in store tonight. And last week's show was really good.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Last week's show about the moose.

>> Mike: Yep.

>> Darin: Holy crap.

>> Mike: Holy.

>> Darin: So good. So this show is going to be even gooder.

>> Mike: Yeah. I got a story I, do want to talk about vacation planning. It's that time of year where if you haven't already planned your vacation, you got to hop to it. And I want to talk about. A chunk of my house flew off the.

>> Darin: Oh, wow. Fun times. Welcome to the show. So it's been. How you doing?

>> Mike: I'm okay. it's a little weird. We're starting a little early. Tonight. I had to have some, contractors come out and look at my house. A piece of my house flew off.

>> Darin: It's always fun. And em, any m. There's a twister.

>> Mike: Yeah. So I. So Darren came in and I. I told him something blew off my house. And he said, what blew off? And I said, a fascia. And you looked at me like m. You weren't sure if I were. If I were pulling your leg.

>> Darin: I said, was that in your fascia?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Get it in your face.

>> Mike: You can insert a little, clown horn.

>> Darin: This show needs a laughter so much better than last.

>> Mike: People need to be shown when to laugh.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: On this freaking show. Yeah.


Charlie had a basketball party at the end of his basketball career for 2025

so yesterday was the. Just the scheduling day from heck. Okay. So I had work. I, came home and Charlie had a basketball party. A party at the end of his basketball career for the year 2025. Okay, 2024 into 2025.

>> Darin: Were they throwing down?

>> Mike: They threw down. they had the pizza. They had the, one of those chocolate chip cake things with the icing on it. a cake and a cake. And then they told. Yes.

>> Darin: One of them chocolate chip cake things with the frosting.

>> Mike: I made a cookie. The great dog. The cookie cake. The cookie cake. Okay, I. I know words. I have. I know more words than I did back in episode 10. Yes, I've learned words since then. I just don't have the ability.

>> Darin: To use them where to put them in a sentence.

>> Mike: It's. Hell knows I have a toolbox in this house, but be damned if you ever see me pick a tool out of there, knowing what I'm doing with it. Occasionally I'll screw a screw over there, but that's it.

>> Darin: Okay.


Part of our house flew off today during a basketball practice for Charlie

>> Mike: Anyway, point is, we have this basketball party. We had to leave the party early. To go to March Madness basketball practice for Charlie. Right. During that practice, I worked on videos, for the irritable dad syndrome. Oh, that's the podcast, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

>> Darin: You're listening to it right now as.

>> Mike: I'm working on those videos. So this Practice went from 8 to 9. As I'm working on them, I get a text from Bess that says part of our house flew off. Oh. The neighbor told Andrew about it. So I came home. Me and Charlie are walking around the house with, our phone flashlights because we can't find our flashlights. So we use our phones.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: To see where upon from the house. Something off with it flown. My teeth got in the way of my words. Yeah. What fell off our house? So today. And we found it and we put it in the, in the garage. Today I had some contractors come out. I wanted to get two quotes too, Darren, not one. You don't want to have just one.

>> Darin: Guy always get more than one. Always.

>> Mike: when we had our, this house, this house inspected, we had two inspectors.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I will tell you, if you ever want to make your real estate agent nervous and freak out, tell them you're getting another inspection. Dude lost his mind. Like, the facade came off. He's like, why, why would you get two inspections? I was like, I just, I want to. The first guy, he couldn't climb the ladder to look at the stuff.

>> Darin: Who inspects houses if they can't climb a ladder?

>> Mike: He brought his wiener dog with him. And that's not a euphemism.

>> Darin: I'm glad you finished it.

>> Mike: Forward to that sentence.

>> Darin: I mean, I brought mine, too, but. Oh.

>> Mike: I tend to bring it everywhere. Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: He brought his wiener dog, Sam Kinison. His wife makes him leave it at home. Come on. All the other guys are bringing him.

>> Mike: He walks in with this thing. Thing under his arm, like he's carrying a football.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: And he's like, do you mind if I bring whatever the hell her name was? And I'm like, I guess Priscilla.

>> Darin: Like, what are you gonna say, no?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Then he takes the dog home, and.

>> Mike: Then he just walked around, and he couldn't get up to certain areas. He's like, ah. There's usually no problems up there. So I told. I told the real estate guy, seriously, no problem. I wouldn't. I want another guy to come look at it. They lost their minds. What? Well, the other guy found some things that needed to be fixed, so I did.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So I. I'm like, I'm always going to get two quotes, so. Two quotes.


Two people come out to fix shingles on your home

>> Darin: All right.

>> Mike: Two people coming out. So I had to leave a little early because I had to be here when they're here. So I did the work from home thing for a few hours. The first guy came out, he looked at it, didn't even care that I had the remnants that have fallen off. He just flat out said, you don't need what fell off. We need to replace that. That looks bad. And he said, by the way, the other part of it looks like it's had some damage. Looks like somebody's nailed it back.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: Pointed that out to me. I was like, oh, yeah. He's like. And it's bent a little bit. So I'm going to replace this one. I'm going to reattach, you know, make sure that other side is fastened. And then there was a flashing problem over on the other thing. He said, you need to have some shingles replaced. Take care of that. We'll replace all the flashing. There's no damage. You just need to get it fixed before, you know, you have another event and you'll be fine. I have the quote for you before I leave your driveway. Damn. Damn. Yeah, that's great. Professional as hell. Everything came electronically. foreshadowing and spoiler. When I signed his contract, it was electronic signatures. Ah. Like, alerted him and let him know, blah, blah, blah. I thought it was great.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Oh, good. I actually thought about calling off the second guy.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I don't need him because this dude knows everything. But you got to have another quote.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: The Other guy shows up, okay. I'm gonna tread very carefully because I don't want to cause any issues, okay. He looks at the place where the thing is missing, okay. And he says, that can't be replaced. Do you have the piece that fell off? And I said, whoa, whoa, whoa. You can't just make a new. I was like, I think I'd rather have a new piece.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: And he said, and I quote, impossible.

>> Darin: Impossible.

>> Mike: We, we live in the age where you can send rockets up and then bring them back down and catch them.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I can grind my camos. Listen.

>> Darin: Around the world, they combined honey and mustard to make honey mustard. They can do anything.

>> Mike: Yeah, he lost me a little bit there.

>> Darin: Yeah. And he's possible.

>> Mike: And he. I. So I, I said, well, it's ripped a little bit and there's holes in it. And he said, I can do it. I said, I. Internally I'm thinking, I don't doubt that you can do it.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: But should you do this or should you replace it with something new?


Mike wanted shingle repair on his roof and he quoted two different prices

So then I thought, I'll ask him about the shingle portion, because the other guy, all I was asking him to do was repair it. And he said, you need to reshingle this portion, reflash it, color match it, and it'll be, It'll be good.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I brought him m over there and he just looked at it and he said, I can do this. And I. Okay. There's a lot of detail that's left out of that statement. Right. And he was like, I was starting to, like, fondle tools that he had. Oh. And like he was going to do it right then. Let me rephrase.

>> Darin: Playing with his nuts and bolts.

>> Mike: He acted like he was going to do it right then. So then I was like.

>> Darin: Hold on, Chester.

>> Mike: And he did quote me a price. Right. It's like, what would this cost? He quoted a price that was way below the other guy.

>> Darin: Yeah. But you know, it's like, okay, so what, let's say one price is, 700 and then another price is like 550.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay. I'm gonna go with the 550.

>> Mike: Right.

>> Darin: But if one 701's 85.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I think they're going to be missing a few.

>> Mike: They're missing a few things.

>> Darin: Or a lot of things.

>> Mike: I'm sure the second guy, I mean, he has great reviews, probably a nice guy, probably did wonderfully. I am a house idiot. I want this problem fixed and I never want to look up there again until someday in the Future. Another neighbor says, hey, the other piece fell off.

>> Darin: Santa Claus fell through the room, through the thing.

>> Mike: I don't ever think about it. I'm not ever going to be looking out there again. I didn't even know that part of the house existed. I mean intellectually I know it has to be there.

>> Darin: Yeah, there's.

>> Mike: That's where Andrew sleeps under that. I know it exists. Wait, I haven't been to that part of the house.

>> Darin: Just Andrew sleep like the whole family.

>> Mike: Sleeps under right where that.

>> Darin: Oh, gotcha.

>> Mike: Okay, so I don't want people thinking we live in this huge mansion. We don't know. It's just I am a. I am at my heart a studio apartment kind of guy. Right.

>> Darin: Fair enough.

>> Mike: I could live like if the bed from our bedroom. Were downstairs right next to where the kitchen. Like if you had the kitchen right there and then the. Where we had the computer at that little 400 square foot place. I could live in that.

>> Darin: Yeah, Yeah. I saw on the TikTok, they like the world's smallest apartment in New York City and. Or well, New York's smallest apartment. And I'm like, you know what? If I was a single guy, I think I would like that. Enjoy it like this.

>> Mike: There's a lot of room down here. I don't. The only time I come down here is like when we're doing this.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: Recently we're watching Breaking Bad as the family.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I had to relearn how to use all this crap because this is now Charlie's. He is already. I'm not even dead yet and he's already inherited all this. And then the upstairs is just. I gotta wash myself and I go to sleep. Other than that, you'll find me in the kitchen, on the toilet or in front of the computer. Those are the three places you'll find me. Usually doing something different in each spot, but.

>> Darin: Well, hopefully you're not washing yourself in front of the computer.

>> Mike: I do. And here's the discussion.

>> Darin: You're on a teams meeting. Mike, what are you doing?

>> Mike: Obviously I went with the first guy. I know I'm spending a lot more money, but I just, it's more, it's like a peace of mind.

>> Darin: Understand?

>> Mike: I'm gonna have a problem here. You don't screw, don't screw around with your roof.

>> Darin: No.

>> Mike: You know, no, if, if I'm like having somebody replace one of these little banisters over here, then I'll screw around.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: You know, guys say, oh, fix it for 20 bucks. Okay. I'm at it.


I just spent $2,000 on the Kia M

But if it's your roof, no.

>> Darin: Yeah. it's. It's worth a little extra money.

>> Mike: A little TLC.

>> Darin: A little bit.

>> Mike: And I just spent $2,000 on the Kia M. And the guy you hate, your Kia at the place said, and I quote, I don't think there's much more that can go wrong with this thing.

>> Darin: He said.

>> Mike: He said, over the past couple years, you've replaced everything but the engine.

>> Darin: Different wheels, different doors.

>> Mike: Everything's new on it. At this point, that car, I love and hate it. I feel guilty when I say I hate it on this podcast, and then I drive it and it does what I bought it for. It gets me from here to work and back safely.


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For the longest time, everybody knows that your favorite band is U2

Now, back to you guys in the studio.

>> Darin: For the longest time, everybody knows that your favorite band is U2. Okay? And U2 is a band that everyone in the world knows who they are. Penguins in Antarctica have heard of U2. Okay.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: Everybody knows who U2 is.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. So one of my favorite bands I've mentioned before, Southern Culture on the Skids. One of my other favorite bands who came out in the 90s, Scots, is this band called the Screaming Cheetah Wheelies.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: To which everybody says, what? Who? Nobody knows who they are. And for years now, I have told them about how great the Screaming Sheet of Wheelies are, and I've played music for people, and I've said I've recommended their albums, and you got to check them out and look them up online. And they're still on Spotify. And you can find the Screaming cheetah wheelies on YouTube. And you can find them all over the interwebs. Right?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And still people go, who?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay. So anyway, the lead singer of Screaming Cheetah Wheelies, his name is Mike Ferris.

>> Mike: Mike Ferris.

>> Darin: Mike Ferris.

>> Mike: Mike Ferris.

>> Darin: Mike Ferris.

>> Mike: Mike Ferris.

>> Darin: He came to. Mike, I'm gonna do this. I have a problem with this. As long as you do it, I'm gonna do it. So stop. He was at the Ludlow Garage in Cincinnati.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: And, the Screamin shooter Wheelies broke up in 2001. I think they found out that they occasionally will do a reunion tour and stuff. So Mike Farris came to Ludlow Garage. And, I bought my ticket. You didn't want to go.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I asked you if you want to go, and you're like, yeah, I'm going to pass. So you passed. And nobody else I knew wanted to go. So here I am. Dork. Went to this concert by myself. And when I ordered the ticket, on the interwebs, it said that it's a general admission ticket. And so I ordered it, but it still printed off my thing saying, a row and a seat number.

>> Mike: Yeah, like, they do that.

>> Darin: If it's. If it's general admission, why do I have a row and a seat number?

>> Mike: Yeah.


I haven't been to a general admission concert in forever

>> Darin: Anyway, so just in case I haven't been to a general admission, if I.

>> Mike: May, let me insert a little Ask Mike.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: The reason a lot of places do that is they have a set number of people that are allowed to be in there.

>> Darin: Yeah, that makes sense.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: This is one of my things. I haven't been to a general admission concert in forever. I got there stupid early, like an hour and a half early, right when they were opening the doors. And I'm the only person sitting there. I'm the first person sitting there.

>> Mike: You work there. Hey, bud, get the light. Get bit to my lights here.

>> Darin: Sweep it up around there, you know, so I'm the first person sitting there waiting for this show to start. And I'm like, God, I'm a dork. Such a dork. But anyway, they told me, they said, yeah, this is your row and your seat number, that's an assigned seat.

>> Mike: Oh.

>> Darin: So wherever I ordered the ticket, they were wrong. So I'm sitting in my row on my seat and just la de da waiting. And lo and behold, who walks down the hallway but Mike Ferris.

>> Mike: Wow.

>> Darin: And I'm like, oh. And I get up and I'm trying to be cool, because, you know, you don't want to scare these celebrity, Types. I'm like, mike. I said, hi. He goes, hey. I said, I've been a fan of you since the 90s, since the cheetah Wheelies, and I've never seen you. And he said, well, how come you've never seen me? I said, you guys have never been, where I was. Well, where have you been?

>> Mike: That's awesome.

>> Darin: Where do you live? I'm like, well, I live in Cincinnati now. And he says, we've been to Cincinnati.

>> Mike: He's calling you out on your what he's done.

>> Darin: He says, do you, do you even follow m. Me? Yeah. You know I won a Grammy, right? Yeah, I did know that. Anyway, he's just laughing and I said, can I get a picture? Sure. So I get a picture with him. and God, if he wasn't cool as hell. So cool.


Grant Day went to see Mike Ferris last night and it was amazing

The show starts at 7:30. Here it is 7:25 and like the first five rows are full.

>> Darin: The remaining 25 behind them are empty except for me, who's sitting where I'm supposed to sit. And I said, I think I'm going to move up. So I went and I asked a lady who worked there, I said, this thing starts in a few minutes, right? And she says, yeah, that's what it said. I said, so, so I can move up, you know? She goes, yeah, absolutely. And okay, so I moved up. Mike, I'm row four now.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: I could have sat in row one.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: I could have got the very first row. But row four on the end was fine. Plenty up. I mean, you're right there. Yeah, right there. And also I didn't want, you know, these people who got there, they've been there a long time and I'm just getting in front of them, they want to bid. So I'm sitting there and I'm watching it and the show is amazing. Absolutely amazing. It's him and guitar. And then he brings out a harmonica for a song and he was singing so hard I thought his face was going to come off. I've never seen anybody who could sing like this. And he would tell stories in between his, in between his songs. Occasionally he would tune his guitar and he'd look at it go. And I'm just, I'm like, for some reason I could have sat there for an hour hearing him going, tuning his guitar and, and the show was amazing and everything was great until about halfway through. I'm being very careful here. I hope that the two guys who sat behind me aren't listening.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: They Were nice guys.

>> Mike: Okay?

>> Darin: They were nice because they were talking to each other. I don't think they realized how loud they were talking to each other.

>> Darin: That's a trigger for me. That bugs me. I mean, now, Grant, I could have moved anywhere. Yeah. But I had the perfect view m of Mike Ferris. Okay. And I'm like, I can tolerate them because they were talking a little bit. Not a lot, just a little bit. And then Mike is introducing this song. He said when he recorded the song, he recorded it with this beautiful, African American choir. And they're not here tonight, so I am m using a non African American choir, you guys, to sing along with us. And he says, and all you got to know the words are, we will never worry no more.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay. So he starts into the song and he cues us and the, the crowd's like, we will never worry no more. We will never worry no more. Except for the guy behind me. We will never worry no more. We will never worry no more.

>> Mike: Yeah, he was excited. He was excited.

>> Darin: We will never worry. Then Mike Ferris says, you know, he says, you know, look at, look at your person who came into the show with you and just let them know that you're with them and we'll never worry no more.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And look at the person, look at your neighbor next to you and give them that. And you know, he passed me on the shoulder. I got you, brother. But yeah, we will never worry.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Anyway, I bought his album and, Mike Ferris, if you go to mike ferrissmusic.com and his last name is F A R R I s mike ferrismusic.com, you can order his album, you can see his tour dates. I cannot recommend highly enough listening to this guy's albums and going and seeing him live. He was amazing.

>> Mike: I didn't see you in my dream last night Sleep came on too easy so as I walk alone I knew I found sanctuary In a cemetery in my mind Where I lay my phone to you who to rest so we also saw a live band.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: on Sunday.

>> Darin: Yep.

>> Mike: It was. We didn't know. so Bess said, It's almost St. Patrick's Day. Let's go see if there's anywhere that has, like, a green beer. So we always go to the. The. We call it Dingleberries, but it's the Dingle House right there in the. In the Westchester.

>> Darin: I love dingleberries. Did they have the green beer?

>> Mike: Well, they did. When we walked in, we didn't see any, so we just ordered our normal, which is Harp. Harp is my beer. And then we saw people with green beer. And I asked the server, I was like, what was. How do you get the green beer? And she said, that's Michelob Ultra. And I said, okay, you keep your green beer. Keep. Keep your.

>> Darin: It's pbr.

>> Mike: Keep your damn tincture away from me. And you can look that word up later.


Braveheart used to be my favorite movie

Anyway, the point is, there was a. I, want to be kind.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: There was a local band there.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I think they were local. They had a bagpipe player.

>> Darin: Oh, okay.

>> Mike: Okay. Now I know. Before the Lord of the Rings movies came out, before I saw Return of.

>> Darin: The King, was it Ali the Piper? No, I've seen her. Yeah.

>> Mike: No, no, this person had no name. Brave. I'll say this Braveheart used to be my favorite movie.

>> Darin: Would you be willing to trade all.

>> Mike: The days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to.

>> Darin: Come back here and tell our enemies.

>> Mike: That they may take our lives, but they'll never take our freedom. Okay, so I don't have a problem with back. But I thought the music in Braveheart was beautiful. I love one of the few soundtracks that I've like, purchased. Yeah, I love that soundtrack.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: When I heard the bagpipes in that soundtrack, I would think, why would anybody dislike bagpipes?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Exhibit A.

>> Mike: So it's me and Bess and Charlie. And we. Me and Bess both say to Charlie, oh, look, there's guy has bagpipe. Those are bagpipes.

>> Darin: Those are bagpipes.

>> Mike: So he starts to play. Now I am.

>> Darin: Was it just a bagpipe player?

>> Mike: No, no. There was somebody that had drums. There was somebody that had a guitar.

>> Darin: Was it a drum kit or like a. Like a drum?

>> Mike: It was like. I didn't get a good view of it.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: It wasn't like a full kit. It was like a half kit. Like where you have the snare and the. In the thing. Sure. the thing. Notice I'm saying there was a guy that had drums. There was a guy that had a guitar.

>> Mike: And there was the guy that had the bagpipes. And there was a lady that had the microphone to sing.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: There was not a guitar player. There was not a drummer.

>> Darin: There just was not a bagpipe player and people accompanying the instruments. Okay.

>> Mike: And then they had like a hype lady. I don't know. She.

>> Darin: A hype lady.

>> Mike: She was. She was just dancing like this, like, moving, like, thing.

>> Darin: Like it would start like wood.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And she had metal rings hanging off.

>> Darin: Of, like, hippies at a fish concert.

>> Mike: Yes.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Yeah. I didn't want to come out and say it, but there you go. Hippies and their plan. So they got a bagpipe guy. Right?

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Right, huh?

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: So you're gonna play some bagpipe. You know, some classes. St. Patrick's Day.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Some classical, classy bagpipes. No, they were playing Cranberries if you want to hear.

>> Darin: Now, I love Zombie.

>> Mike: I love. Yeah, the Cranberries. I wasn't really a big fan of that song.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: But I appreciate it for what it was.


This gentleman added in bagpipes to AC DC song

>> Darin: Yep.

>> Mike: I love the Cranberries.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Dolores, this lady was not the Cranberry. No, this band was not. No, you can't. You could recognize the song. And then when the bagpipes came in. I don't know if you've heard Zombie. I have recently. There's no bagpipes. No. This gentleman added in bagpipes. Now let me add the rest of the rest of the quote band, unquote, were wearing normal clothes. The bagpipe dude was full. He was in full regalia. He had the kilt, he had the button up shirt. He had a big mustache. He had a green hat with a thingy on the top like he's golfing. Like he's golfing. And he was going. I think they were out of tune. I'm, Mike, how do you know they were out of tune? I'll tell you. When they came in, I thought an accident was happening. You know where Dingle house is? You can see the Roadhouse. I thought a car was screeching into another car, but it was this guy playing the bagpipes. And I said to Bess, and I'm going to post this video on our Facebook account and on our Instagram account.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I said, the Bessie, they need to. Since they're playing like contemporary stuff, they need to play. It's, a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll.

>> Darin: AC DC Bagpipe.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So they started playing that. I didn't request it.

>> Mike: It was just like they intuitive said, I heard what Mike wants to hear and I will put it in their hearts to play this boy, when they got to it and when he kicked in, I. Who. No, no, no, no, no.

>> Darin: No. God, please, no, no.

>> Mike: What the hell was that? Boy howdy. It's got to be heard to believe. Be believed. And so I, I did post it on my personal account and I, I sent it into our little, group and, you know, Dan, our friend Dan tried to be nice. He said, I Recognize that song? One of our fans on the. On the group is also fans with me on. Friends with me on. On Facebook, like my normal Facebook account. And she said, and I quote, awful. And there were laughings at it. And I feel bad for the dude, but somebody should have told her. So I had this recording on my phone.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: We were driving back, and I said, I know that those bagpipes had to be out of tune. I don't know how you tune a bagpipe.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: But we played the AC DC song up through the bagpipe part. Okay. That's how it's supposed to sound. And then we played what we heard. What I had on my video. I don't think so. I mean, we used to watch American Idol. You know, Randy would say, it's a little.

>> Darin: Little pitchy dog.

>> Mike: Yeah, it was definitely a little bit on the pitchy side. backpack. Dude, take those puppies into. I mean, I know they don't have a Sam Goody or whatever anymore, but wherever you take these damn things. And at home, back. Back where I'm from, it was called the Pied Piper. Was the music store. And they would tune your.

>> Darin: For you.

>> Mike: He needs to find the. Go to the. Take it to the guitar center. I don't know if there's a bagpipe center.

>> Darin: I don't know that you tune bagpipes, because it's like. Yeah, I don't think you can tune a trumpet, can you?

>> Mike: These were either out of tune or he was playing them incorrectly. But you could hear the notes. You could hear what he was. He was trying to get there. You could tell that he'd heard the song before.

>> Darin: Yeah, cut that out.

>> Mike: You ever heard a kid like, you go to, like, your. Your kids, like, They call them recorders now, but back when we were kids, they call them flutophones.


You remember that concert we went to when the kids were little

Yeah, you gotta play.

>> Darin: I never called it a flutophone.

>> Mike: That's what we called them, the flutophones. And I know our parents had to come and we had to. Mary played a little.

>> Darin: Mary had a little lamb Had a little lamb. Hot cross fleece was white as snow yeah.

>> Mike: Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffin.

>> Darin: Oh, what's in the bowl?

>> Mike: Anyway? I felt like I was at one of those things. I felt like when we were clapping at the end, I felt like saying, isn't that precious? It's beautiful.

>> Darin: You remember that concert we went to when the kids were little, that band thing?

>> Mike: We got in so much. I almost got us both in trouble. I couldn't stop Laughing.

>> Darin: The first kid comes up and the teacher introduces us. And little Billy's gonna do a solo here.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And he comes out there with his flute or trumpet goes. And then he walks off his mic.

>> Mike: Looks at me like, what the hell was that? Yeah.

>> Darin: And then I had to stop looking.

>> Mike: At you because we were front row. I remember.

>> Darin: And then Libby.

>> Mike: Yeah. Oh.

>> Darin: Oh. She, like, steps on my foot. Stop it. I'm like, Mike's making me m. Stop looking at Mike.

>> Mike: There was a little girl that got up there because I got the player.

>> Darin: That kid nailed the B flat scale.

>> Mike: I got it.

>> Darin: I just thought he was gonna be.

>> Mike: I gotta.

>> Darin: Stupid.

>> Mike: I got in the song. I got a glare from Bess, a slap on my knee, and a. Stop it. Because this little girl came up. Everything's dead quiet. And she. Whatever instrument she put to her mouth, it just went. And it couldn't hold it back. I just went. It just came out just like a briefest. Like, only us. I pray that only us in the.

>> Darin: Front row, because I remember I looked at you. I had to stop looking at you at 1 minute and 12 seconds into the concert. I was. I was just looking away.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I'm like, mike Odle does not exist.

>> Mike: No. I was. No. No.

>> Darin: Well, the. The bagpipes. I feel bad for anybody who plays the bagpipes because I follow Ali the piper on social media. And Cameron and I went last year to see Elliot the piper.

>> Mike: Yeah. Amazing. Yeah.

>> Darin: Right? She can do Long Way to the Top if you want to rock and roll. She can do Free Bird.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay. You can go on the YouTubes and see video of her playing Crazy Train. Killing it.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: On Crazy Train. She is amazing.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Everybody else, not so much.

>> Mike: Yeah. This guy.

>> Darin: Why do you not play the cowbell and the bagpipes?

>> Mike: I had read long ago that the bagpipes were invented. They were like, They taken the stomach of a goat.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: And put horns on the. On the different holes and squeezed it m. I think that's what. I think he was trying to emulate the original.


Irritable Dad Syndrome goes old school with bagpipe sound

>> Darin: It was old school.

>> Mike: Old school. And the original bagpipe sound.

>> Darin: Trying to go old school.

>> Dave: You are listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

>> Darin: That's a joke. Deal with it.


Mike: Book club is a dirty rotten sham

Did you know, Mike, that your wife and my wife have been hanging out, like, unsupervised, like, without you or I there to make sure that.

>> Mike: Without husbandly guidance.

>> Darin: Yeah. what's. I mean, did we approve that? Was that. I don't remember.

>> Mike: I sure as Hell didn't. I'll tell you. I'll tell you something else.

>> Darin: What?

>> Mike: This book club is m a dirty rotten sham. It's a dirty book club club. Quote, unquote. Book club is a lie and I'll tell you why.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I'll tell you why.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Because.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Bess reads. Ahead right down the series. Right.

>> Darin: Was she gonna win a prize?

>> Mike: Yeah. And then everybody decides they're not going to read the rest of the series and then she's stuck catching up.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Because your wife.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And there's other people in this group.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: They're gonna make fun of her because she didn't read the book and she doesn't know what she's talking about.

>> Darin: So you think there's gonna be bullying going on in this book?

>> Mike: I told her I made it all the way through college. Showing up every day, having not read the book, not knowing what the hell I was talking about.

>> Darin: Neither did I. That was the challenge for me.

>> Mike: One of my best stories from college is literally not reading the book and writing a 10 page paper on the book in M less than 20 minutes. That's way back.

>> Darin: Was that the one where you did the advanced spacing?

>> Mike: Advanced literal Russian. Russian.

>> Darin: L400 print. Yeah, 400 scale.

>> Mike: Me and about six other losers in the computer lab.

>> Darin: Oh yeah, you told me about that.

>> Mike: Where.

>> Darin: Yeah. You had to run off and print it and then the. Dude. All you had to do was answer and type it. Yeah. And all you had to do is answer like the last question or something.

>> Mike: Or you, you couldn't pass the class. You still had to take the final.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And he, as he was passing out the final, he said, by the way, if you don't turn in the paper, you fail the class.

>> Darin: Oh.

>> Mike: Which means because it was a tier 3 class, it's only offered once a year. You are stopped from graduating for another.

>> Darin: Full year and you're screwed.

>> Mike: You may or may not know this. I don't know how it is today with these, whippersnappers kids today, but back in the day. You, at that point in your college career. This was in the spring court. This is the end. I already had prospects lined up. I had a life plan for after college.

>> Darin: Prospects.

>> Mike: Prospects. Not the old, panhandling prospects. I'm talking.

>> Darin: There's gold. Yes sir.

>> Mike: Like graduate ou they give you a donkey and a sieve.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: Say go down to the.

>> Darin: They give you a mule. 40 acres every week. When Libby comes home after this, book club I said, so what happened? She goes, oh, not much. Right.

>> Mike: Hey, I get the same. Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: They're hiding something.

>> Mike: You remember? So we're watching breaking.

>> Darin: Not only are they hiding something, they're planning something.

>> Mike: Right. That's what Walt did.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: He would come home.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: From cooking it up with Jesse out in the reserve.


M. I'm reading Game of Thrones for pleasure right now

>> Darin: Yeah. And he was at book club.

>> Mike: Yeah. He was like, nothing.

>> Darin: Book club M, my ass.

>> Mike: What's that smell? Oh, M. Oh, it must be the herbs.

>> Darin: The books.

>> Mike: The herb books. We read a book on herbs.

>> Darin: There's, there's, there's Skyler. There's all kinds of hippies in the library. Yeah, yeah. You know what?

>> Mike: You gotta be careful when you go through a library. He was. Hippie will jump out.

>> Darin: He was a great meth cook. He was also a great teacher, but he was a horrible liar.

>> Mike: Oh, he got good at it. Towards the end. Well, he just didn't care anymore. At the end. He just flat out just didn't care.

>> Darin: He's like, I was a, ah, puppy gas. So the next thing you know, I've got all this gasoline all over me. And I came home and I was so bad, I just threw my clothes on the floor and now the whole house smells like gasoline.

>> Mike: He would offer up lies where none were needed. He just like. There's the one episode we just passed. He was cooking breakfast. He's like, ah. You know that extra cell phone that you said you think you heard?

>> Darin: Right?

>> Mike: You know, I tell you what that is. M. there's a ringtone that I use as an alarm. And it's not really. There's nobody on the other end. It's just an alarm. And I think, I just. I think. Skyler, I think that's what you heard. Huh?

>> Mike: Where are you going? Out.

>> Darin: Out? Yeah. To book club.

>> Mike: Book club?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: See, I'm reading books for pleasure right now. I'm. I've been reading the first Game of Thrones book since 1984. I'm in the last hundred pages. I've been reading. And the sad thing is I've read that book before and I've seen the series and I'm still learning new things.

>> Darin: Possibly even fathom reading a book again. You people, I'm telling you, you people who read books again are psychopaths.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Like, if you had any idea how long it takes me to muster the strength to read through a book.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: The first time.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I'm gonna do that again. I don't think so.

>> Mike: So the second book is the one I got 100 pages in, and I put it down and I said, there's just too many words here, you guys.

>> Darin: You gotta let me catch up. I mean, put a couple blank pages in there.

>> Mike: The pre. Because you look at stealing this from Nate Bargetzi, think, damn, that's a thick book. It's a lot of pages, two Cs. And each page has one, side. On both sides, there's more words to go through. And then in the Game of Thrones books, the type is so small, what is normally a page in a book that I'm used to reading is probably two lines on a page in that, but it just goes.


Mike: Everyone's allowed to have a favorite. I'm not concerned about it

>> Darin: Have you gotten to the point where you use your phone to use, the camera so you can read the number that's on the back of your credit card?

>> Mike: Well, yeah.

>> Darin: Mike, have you ever noticed that you can't say something is your favorite thing without starting an argument? Yeah, the other day. I. I try to post something on Facebook every day. Okay. And I. I, This whole last week, I've been uninspired. I haven't had anything, nothing. And so I'm driving around in the car and I was listening to the Spin Doctors. And for years now, Two Princes has been my favorite Spin Doctor song. Okay. By a mile. There's nothing can compete with it. I've been listening to the Spin Doctors more and more, and I've been really reconsidering how great a song Little Miss Can't Be Wrong is. And this gave me the idea of something to post on Facebook, so I posted. For decades now, my favorite song has been Two Princesses. But here lately, I've been thinking that maybe it's Little Miss Gy wrong.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And so I haven't made a final decision. I'm not concerned about it, but I'm still giving it lots of thought. And that's where I've been. And that's why you haven't seen me post so many things on Facebook.

>> Mike: Haha.

>> Darin: Uh-huh. I'll let you guys know.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So I get a comment. The first comment was like, are you only considering the singles? I mean, they have other albums. Yeah. So, you know, maybe you ought to give the rest of their catalog this some consideration.

>> Mike: SNL Weezer thing is where this started to go. I saw the beginnings of this and I, Yeah, I stepped away from that.

>> Darin: Yeah. Then another guy jumps in there and says, yeah. Have you considered any of their deep tracks? I'm like, how about I give you a deep track? I'm Just like, one.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: It's a joke.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Two. It's like, okay, what's your favorite Tom Hanks movie?

>> Mike: Saving Private Ryan.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Or Green Mile. I don't know.

>> Darin: So you're only considering the blockbusters. Have you looked at some of his, independent films? Like. Yeah. I mean, have you watched Mazes and Monsters? God, yeah. Have you watched Mazes and Monsters, Mike?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Have you seen Not Sober.

>> Mike: JJ what am I doing here, kid?

>> Darin: Why can't I remember? I'm like, like, what's your favorite U2 song?

>> Mike: Oh, Lord. Bad.

>> Darin: Bad. Okay. Yeah. you're all. Have you listened to anything off of Boy? Yeah, you know, they have earlier stuff.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: You know, it's like you can listen to two Guns n Roses songs. Those can be the only two that you know. And if you like one more than the other. Hey, that's your favorite song.

>> Mike: Yes.

>> Darin: It's your favorite.

>> Mike: From what you know, that's your favorite. Everyone's allowed to have their favorite.

>> Darin: Everyone's allowed to have a favorite.

>> Mike: Like what?

>> Darin: That's like. Have you. Have you listened to the Deep tracks.

>> Mike: One of my favorite podcasts of all time. And I'll give them a small plug here. I don't even know if they still operate anymore. I used to listen to them all the time. Film junk. They had wildly. It was like three or four guys would get together and talk about movies for each show was, like, three hours long. It was awesome. And they would get into, like, mass. They have massive disagreements. And, you know, any show you listen to, you guys kind of get a sense of Darren's personality. You get a sense of my personality.


I wrote a huge response to your post to Spin. Now my response was funny, but nowhere near as funny as the original posting

You tend to know, oh, I know how this guy's gonna think about this or how this person. And they wildly disagree. But then they always come around. They always say, you like what you like. Yeah, you like what you like.

>> Darin: That's your favorite. I'm not sitting there saying, this is.

>> Mike: Their best album, so I will tell you. You don't know this because you're not me. And you. And you don't have a camera in my house.

>> Darin: There are days.

>> Mike: Think you do.

>> Darin: There are days where I wake up and I say something. I'm like, I'm acting just like Mike. Then Libby slapped me.

>> Mike: I wrote a huge response to your post to my Spin.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And I thought it was hilarious.

>> Darin: Huh?

>> Mike: But I didn't post it, because I felt that it was cheap. I felt I didn't want to debase myself by posting that. Yeah, I was going for a cheap laugh. When really the glory was taken by you. in that original posting. Now my response was funny, but nowhere near as funny as the fact that you originally posted it. And I remember thinking, the only thing that's gonna make this thread suck is if people get into an argument. So I deleted my thing and I set my phone aside and a few hours later I look and 20 responses.

>> Darin: Yeah, now most of the people got it. Yeah, yeah, understood. Well, let us know when you make a decision. I'm anxiously awaiting to hear what you have to say.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: My friend Natasha said, talk about a cliffhanger. Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: Part of the spirit of mine was to drive a little further, but I felt like yours was perfect. So. Monty Python. I love Monty Python.

>> Darin: Oh, Monty Python.

>> Mike: The when King Arthur, Lord of the Britons.

>> Darin: Monty Python.

>> Mike: When they come up on the, the French, when they come just clanking together.

>> Darin: A couple of coconut.

>> Mike: John Cleese yells out, I fart in your general direction. That's a perfect line. Yeah, you can't, you know, if they would added a fart sound effect or anything like that, it would have just cheapened.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: You know, it would have let John Cleese have his moment of glory with the breaking wind joke. And so I let you have your, breaking wind.

>> Darin: Thank you.

>> Mike: It was great.

>> Darin: But I was proud of that post because like I said, I haven't been on there in like a week or so and I'm like, here we go. Long time friends and fans of mine go, yep, that's Darren.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Did you see the results? Have you considered their whole catalog? Oh, I put all their songs into thoughtful consideration. Oh, seriously though, Little Miss Can't Be Wrong is a great song.

>> Mike: It is. It's a great song. Yeah.

>> Darin: Holy crap.

>> Mike: I, I remember back in the 90s, I, I was, I had a long period, longer than I'm comfortable. Comfortable admitting where I was. Kind of a snob. A music snob. Really?

>> Darin: Yeah, I can't see that.

>> Mike: Still a music snob. I get pissy with people, but not like I was. So I, you know, I still, there's, there's some bands that you like because.

>> Darin: You know, the Joshua Tree is YouTube's best album.

>> Mike: See, YouTube for me has hit that point where I, I like most of the, I bet most of the jokes at their expense you hear are from me. I love the Bob Golthwait, the Bobcat Goldthwait. I post that every once in a while.

>> Darin: I love it.

>> Mike: I posted there was a picture of Ali G Which, is the Borat guy. The Ali G show.

>> Darin: Sasha Baron.

>> Mike: Corn and someone. Corn. Someone took a picture of him. He has a character as Ali G with the, the knit. You know, the beanie and the goatee and someone put under there. They.


They posted it on Edge's birthday. Really? A, A, right

They posted it on Edge's birthday. Said Edge is now, you know, happy birthday to the edge at 59. And it's a picture of Ali G. Yeah. I thought that was hilarious. I posted it on my page and I had somebody honestly say, that's not the Edge.

>> Darin: Really?

>> Mike: A, A, right, really. And B, I mean, of all the people who would know that.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I think the top three people who would know that's not the Edge are the Edge, the Edge's mom, and Mike Odle. You don't have to tell me that. It's a joke. That's a joke. Boy, you missed it. That's why I love the Bobcat Goldthwaite thing so much.

>> Darin: I'm.

>> Mike: Wait, I throw him out. I'm, like, fishing for idiots to see if anybody's gonna post on that.

>> Darin: two minutes into it, I'm like, okay, here we go. Here we go.

>> Mike: I'm proud of myself for not posting on it. I'm also concerned that I came close to it. I don't want you to call me out.

>> Darin: I'd love to see what you were.

>> Mike: It wasn't all it was was taking your premise a little further. But it's so. Ah, it's too. It's. It's like too much icing on a. Yeah, you. You did. Well.

>> Darin: Well, no. Do you remember when I was doing, like, Tom Hanks top 10 greatest movies?

>> Mike: There's no crying.

>> Darin: There's no crying in baseball. And then I did Tom Hanks Top 10 Greatest Movies, Part 2.

>> Mike: I threw a few in there.

>> Darin: And then Tom Hanks Worst Movies.

>> Mike: Yeah. Oh, oh, oh.

>> Darin: Then I did Worst Movies Part two. And then I did talk ten Tom Hanks movies that weren't on either list. And then I was like, top 10. I've really got to stop doing this. Tom Hanks movies, right? Yeah.

>> Mike: Ah, yeah.

>> Darin: And finally, at the end, you know, Steve Farrell kept asking me, where is Turner and Hooch? I wouldn't put it on there because he wanted it on there. Finally, finally, Turner and Hooch made it on a top 10 Tom Hanks list.

>> Dave: What's your favorite spin doctor song? Tell us now@inritabledadsyndrome.com.


If you have not already planned vacation time, now's the time to get together

>> Mike: If you have not already planned vacation time, now's the time to get together.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: And plan for where you're going. I don't care where you're going. Put a plan together. Yeah, we've had years where the vacation is. Well, we're gonna go to the park today and figure it out and ride around the lake until we're tired of it and come back home. Yeah, and then you have other times when it's like we're gonna go out in the middle of the desert and look at a dead tree that Nobody's seen for 30 years because dad's a.

>> Darin: Psychopath in 130 degree heat.

>> Mike: And we've had the other one where it's like, Darren and Libby are going to the beach. So we're going to go to the exact same beach. Sorry, that was backwards.

>> Darin: No, I think Libby booked the same trip that you guys are. I knew you were going to go. Wait, I see Dare once a week now. I got to see him on vacation, too. It ended up being.

>> Mike: I give Bess every time. Best you see you. Libby and Bess dream up these things. We're all getting together. And I always give her crap because it's like I have to see Darren every week. And now you got. I got to see him on the weekend too.

>> Darin: Anyway, we had fun.

>> Mike: The point is, is that I remember in my 20s and me and Bess were in our 20s. If we were going to go somewhere, a lot of times we just went somewhere.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: We'd have no kids. We didn't have no kids.

>> Darin: Oh, God.

>> Mike: Remember the day we had a dog that you could leave alone for, more than a few hours or whatever. And it was just like, where are we going on vacation yet? Let's go. I don't care. Let's start driving that direction and do whatever people do when they're over there.

>> Darin: Go with the flow. Like a twig on the shoulder of the mighty stream.

>> Mike: And then there's the, there's the period there when the kids were really little. You had to really, really plan these things. We've got an infant. You know, it's. This is not the time to go skydiving.

>> Darin: No, those. I didn't call those vacations. Those were trips.

>> Mike: Those were guided tours. Yeah, we did them M. To show.

>> Darin: Them, like, go on like actual vacation vacations.

>> Mike: Yeah. Those kids were. That were. Bring this thing with you.

>> Darin: That's.

>> Mike: And spend thousands of dollars. It's never going to remember. Right. And then bring it home.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And then when. When they get old enough to see stuff, you can show pictures and say, yeah, no, you were there. That's goofy. Right? There.

>> Darin: I want to go to the Grand Canyon. We took you to the Grand Canyon. I was one.

>> Mike: Yeah.


Mike and Bess just planned their vacation for this year

So now we, we just planned our vacation for this year and I noticed some theme kept coming up the entire time we were planning it.

>> Darin: What's that, Mike?

>> Mike: I kept saying the phrase, well, you're gonna want to and you're gonna have to in terms of you got to stay somewhere. You. Got to eat something.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: You're going to want to drink after you're there for this many hours.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: You're going to want to buy some from over here. And that's how we budgeted this vacation. Right. So we picked where we want to go, where we want to see the place we want to be at. Right. That's, that's, that's the biggest choice you make in a vacation grammar, right?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. And you're gonna want to sleep somewhere. Now back in our 20s, that could have been anywhere from the car, to someone's couch, to a hotel, to whatever. But it's like we're damn near 50. I will be 50 when we go on this vacation. It's like I'm gonna sleep in a nice. We're gonna nice. This. We're going there and I thought your.

>> Darin: Birthday was in May.

>> Mike: May, yeah. Yeah, we're going on vacation after May.

>> Darin: Oh, okay.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Oh. So yeah.

>> Mike: Oh yeah. That's how time works.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Anyway, they have these things, you're like, well, you want tickets to go to these places? Well, yeah, we're gonna want to go to those places. We're gonna want to do it. So make the place we're staying twice as expensive to get those things. And it's like, ah, You're gonna want to eat, right? Yeah. You're gonna want to.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: You could do this, right? You're gonna want to, you're gonna want to get there. Right. So you just stay at a place that's close to it so you can get there quicker, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess. Yeah. Well, you're going to be down there, you're going to want to go to this other place. Right. And that's just how.

>> Darin: So you're gonna annoy the. Out of everybody.

>> Mike: Yeah. And food. I figured out the budget for food. Started out with we've got a place that has a stove, a microwave and a fridge. We're eating bananas every morning for breakfast.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: We're coming back, we're eating ramen noodles for lunch and we're gonna buy a cheeseburger split It. Four ways for dinner. That's the budget. Right. You could make the argument.

>> Darin: Hold on, hold on. Your part had the pickle on it.

>> Mike: Yes. Right. I need my greens. And then it's like, well, you're gonna want to have a nice meal.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: Once.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And then. Then Bess got involved, and she's like, I'm not. We're gonna. We're on vacation. Because that happened. That's the past few cases. So you've got to be on the same page as your partner.

>> Darin: Every vacation we went to, we have never even asked the question. It's like, gosh, do we want to eat there? you know, we're on vacation, and I don't think we've ever tallied up what we've. The amount of food price that we ate on vacation, because it's like,

>> Mike: It don't even.

>> Darin: I don't want to know. I know. It's more than I want to even think about. Yeah.

>> Mike: So we're. I mean, I'll just say we're.

>> Darin: But we're on vacation.


Darnell goes through this every time he goes on vacation

>> Mike: We're on vacation.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. And I. I've. I've told people before. I go through this every time we go on vacation. The first couple of days, it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Fifty. Fifty.

>> Darin: Wait. Both of you want a sandwich?

>> Mike: Wait. how are fry. How do fries add $8.99 to the meal? They're fries.

>> Darin: Right. French fries.

>> Mike: How does that happen? Yeah. And what's this $50 for drinks? Huh? We had water.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Like. Well, your son had a Sprite.

>> Darin: Sprite. How did we become the black soda?

>> Mike: We don't know. Sprite. Back to you, Darnell.

>> Darin: I, do love Sprite.

>> Mike: Who let him order a Sprite? Right? Okay.

>> Darin: Lord have mercy. They're $5. $5 sprites.

>> Mike: Those are the first couple days, and I'm getting alerts from my bank. You know, that. That say, we believe your card's been stolen by a drunken, whatever. In this state. Are you in the state? Yes, that's me. That's. I'm the one doing that.

>> Darin: Someone just ordered $275 worth of Fritos. Yeah, that was us.

>> Mike: And then something happens in the middle of the vacation where I just let go.

>> Darin: Screw it.

>> Mike: I'm on vacation.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And usually by the. The last two or three days, somebody could walk up to me and say, hey, I'll give you this rock on the ground to take as a souvenir if you pay me 300 bucks. I mean, that one. All right. Can I have two of them for 500. Yeah, okay, I'll take those. I don't care. Like you go. If we're, if we're taking a plane back, water is $50 a cup on the. Okay, can we get two each for everybody here on, this whole row? Because we're all pals.

>> Darin: I don't care.

>> Mike: I'm making it rain.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: The whole last couple of days. And then we spend the rest of the month when we get back, I'm, you know, figuring out what the hell happened.

>> Darin: What happened?

>> Mike: Years vacation. Yes. Selling plasma, going to this year's vacation. At the age that I am with the kids and knowing and being on these for so long, I've started out with that. Yeah, you're going to want to do this, you're going to want to do that. And that's the best way I found to budget it because now we know. Yeah, it looks stupid expensive. It is stupid expensive. But it's like we're gonna do that anyway. So I'm gonna enjoy myself from the first day. Like when we get in the car and pull out, I'm having fun. I'm not gonna let myself take like three or four days to get into the mode before I don't care anymore. I'm just gonna start out that way.

>> Darin: For the first time I think ever, we have. No, I take that back. When we went to Universal a few years ago, we opted to get a nicer hotel room because it came with the free fast pass at the park. Okay. We're like, you know what, we get a nice hotel, we're not going to get one where we're gonna get, you know, have to have a tetanus shot every morning in our stomach. No, we we opted for a nicer hotel in Florida for the, ah, for Universal. So this year we're going to Hilton Head.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And for the first time, we've always stayed four or five blocks down from the beach.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay. And we've always rented bikes and you get on your bike and you ride down to Coligny Plaza at, at Hilton Head and you park your bike and then you go on the beach and you do all the stuff you want to do. For the first time ever, we have got a beachfront hotel.


You mentioned Disney. I don't know if I actually said that we're doing Disney

>> Mike: Okay. All right.

>> Darin: And we're all about to lose our mind and we're like, why don't we ever do this?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Because it's like, okay, yeah, you save a little more, we can see the freaking ocean.

>> Mike: Yeah, that's our window. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: And we've always just said, yeah, okay. You know, it's not that important to us. This year we're doing it.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: By God, we're doing it.

>> Mike: And we can crazy to the beach.

>> Darin: Instead of riding our bike to the beach.

>> Mike: That's funny because we're. We're like doing the same thing. We're kind of doing the thing on our side.

>> Darin: It's like you and I have the same brain.

>> Mike: I don't know if I actually said in this episode that we're doing Disney, but that was part of the. You're gonna wanna. Is we are driving down there. Technically, we could stay anywhere and then just drive the park each day. But part of what we're doing is we're at a place that just shuttles you. You. And I tell you, man, once you. Because we've done that before. Years ago. Yeah, we did the shuttle thing and it's a game changer. You just roll your fat ass out to somewhere near the road and, come and get me. A car with a Goofy head on it pulls up. They will your ass in there. They drive you back to wherever it is that you said you were going to be, and some dude comes out and like, come on out here. And you just. You don't have to do anything. Yeah, it's awesome.

>> Darin: You mentioned Disney. Years ago, a buddy and I, we went. This is in the 90s. We went to Disney World. It was like two weeks before Universal.

>> Mike: Studios, where Disney was really the only thing.

>> Darin: It's the only game in town. Yeah, we parked, in Goofy. Leave it to me to park in the Goofy parking lot. So we're in the Goofy parking lot and then the shuttle comes. Me and my buddy, we get on the shuttle and it's taken off. And then you hear this guy go, oh, don't worry about it, lady. No, don't worry about that at all. I can get the next shuttle. Yeah, kids, I'll see you in the park. I'll get the next shuttle. Don't worry about me. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'll see you when I see you. Go. Don't wait on me. Have fun without me. I'll get there when I get there. So, lady, thanks. I'll just stay right here. And I'm like this poor family. They just got out of the car and Dad's already lost his mind.

>> Mike: I'm sorry. I love vacation meltdowns. I don't know if it's the National Lampoon in me.

>> Darin: Hasn't even started and he's just done.

>> Mike: Yeah.


Next week is our 250th episode on Irritable Dad Syndrome

>> Darin: Oh, guys, we're running out of time and, so we're gonna go. And we want to thank you for listening. We, God, we really, really appreciate you listening and let you know. Next week is our 250th episode.

>> Mike: That's a big deal. We're gonna have Dave Lay.

>> Darin: And maybe a secret guest.

>> Mike: Maybe a secret guest.

>> Darin: Yeah. We've invited a special guest to come onto the show. We'll see if he, Or she. We'll see if that person is going to be on the show. But. Yeah. 250 episodes. So here's the thing. Yeah, I know. I know that there's a lot of people out there. It's like there's so many people who know that I have a podcast and that Mike has a podcast. Right. I know they haven't listened to it yet, and I think that they're holding out. Like, I'm gonna wait for the podcast to become established. Okay. 250 episodes. You can safe to start listening. Okay. Yeah, we're in it for the long run. Yeah. Tell your friends. Yeah, Bring them all in. Invite the whole family. Gather around. You know, like in the 20s and the 30s, they used to sit around the radio. The radio. And the kids would lay on the floor.

>> Mike: Little Orphan Annie is stuck in a blood. She needs to get the tincture out of the thing. Right.

>> Darin: What's gonna happen next? Yeah, it's coming just like that.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: We hope to see you next week on Irritable Dad Syndrome.

>> Dave: Irritable dad Syndrome is a Mark Goodson, Bill Todman production.

>> Darin: Hi, I'm Darren.

>> Mike: I am Mike.

>> Darin: What is wrong with you?

>> Mike: I wanted to. I wanted to be.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: you wanted to in the episode. I want to breathe. Let it breathe. You know, I feel like, we always come in. Yeah.

>> Mike: How you doing?

>> Darin: okay.

>> Mike: Yeah, I am here. I am present. I am present.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Okay, we need to start that.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: So we're driving. I'm like, yeah, we're driving. She's like, can we stop at a Buc EE's?

>> Darin: I'm like, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. We'll probably stop at mini Buc EE's along the way. It's a long drive.

>> Darin: barbecue is great. The turkey sandwiches are great. Banana pudding barbecue featured on last week's episode.

>> Mike: What happened? We just push buttons and hope works here.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah, sure.

>> Mike: Get out there.


Reading, I believe, is the key to smart

And Chris Michael's over there laughing his. Yeah, Chris Michael, face off fishing for idiots.

>> Darin: People in our. The penguins and. And our penguins and. And our Jesus. You know what? Bob the Builder and I are good friends. Yeah. Yeah. We're really good friends. And he's like, cool. And he says, yeah. What's gonna happen to them now?

>> Mike: Oh, Lord.

>> Darin: Your family's upstairs. Like, what is wrong with dare?

>> Mike: So, yeah, so we have this. We have this.

>> Darin: Don't worry about me. I'm fine.

>> Mike: Reading, I believe, is the key to smart. That's what I've always said. And I don't do it because every book is just the most words.

>> Darin: Doesn'T let up.

>> Mike: I mean, every page is more work. It's like, what are you talking about? Put some blank pages in there.

>> Darin: Let me get my head above water for two seconds.

>> Mike: Kick in with the back bite. Here comes. No. No. M. No. All right, cool. Okay. Okay. I don't think they go that long. Recording stopped.