Irritable Dad Syndrome
Cincinnati's Comedy Podcast!
Irritable Dad Syndrome
IDS #232 - Finding the G Spot in Wal-Mart
OK kids strap in, this is a good one! Here's what we discuss this week:
Darin thought he witnessed a possible abduction at Kroger
Emergency Pizza? Hey Domino's... that's stupid!
Jake Paul vs Mike Tyson fight was also stupid
We believe a famous comedian stole a joke from us
What constitutes a proper handshake?
Finally, Darin had the most bizarre customer service experience ever at Walmart
All that and much more this week on Irritable Dad Syndrome!
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This is 232. That's a palindrome, isn't it
>> Mike: This is 232.
>> Darin: 232, yes.
>> Mike: That's a palindrome, isn't it?
>> Darin: same forward as backwards. Yes.
>> Mike: Palindrome. Mm.
>> Darin: It's a palindrome.
>> Mike: Palindrome.
>> Darin: Palindrome. Although I think palindromes are reserved only for words.
>> Mike: Palindrome.
>> Darin: And like, tacos. Language. Taco. Cat is a palindrome.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Yeah. Fireplace. Wait, no. Race car is a palindrome.
>> Mike: Oh, wow. It is.
>> Darin: It is. Yeah.
>> Mike: Wow.
>> Darin: If you'd like to talk about more palindromes, go to irritabledadsyndrome.com and send us a message.
>> Mike: It's a good thing there's gravity.
>> Darin: Otherwise, when birds die, they just stay right up there.
Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast
>> Dave: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, the perfect podcast for when you run out of things to talk about at Thanksgiving. Here are your hosts, Mike and Darren.
>> Darin: Hi, I'm Darren.
>> Mike: I am Mike.
>> Darin: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast. This is episode 232.
>> Mike: Holy crap. 232. One of these, huh? Have passed.
>> Darin: Yes. And this is the 232nd one.
>> Mike: You don't have to listen to any previous episode.
>> Darin: It'd be nice if you did.
>> Mike: It'd be nice if you did.
>> Darin: What are you talking about? I'm just saying before you go on.
>> Mike: There's no narrative here is what I'm saying. There's not a narrative.
>> Darin: You don't have to listen to any of them to understand what we're talking about tonight.
>> Mike: We often have callbacks. Yes. And you can get all of those in the best of. If you look, there's like, episode 52, episode 104, and then we got all screwy with our numbers.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: But you go to our website, www.com.com.
>> Darin: It'S on the Internet.
>> Mike: On the Interwebs.
>> Darin: Yep.
>> Mike: And you can see all of our episodes back to episode 25, and then from 1 to 24 are locked in the vault for the patrons.
>> Darin: By the way, Libby now says, I went on the Interwebs and was looking for that thing you were talking about, Darren. And then she said, damn it, Mike.
>> Mike: Yeah, but we have all kinds of cool, places you can follow us. And, you can sign up for our email list and get emails when we have episodes coming out with cool things attached. Fun stuff. Yeah. Good times.
>> Darin: Thanks for joining us. We're glad that you're here.
Dave: I ran by Kroger to get some drinks before tonight
Hey, I, wanted to mention Dave, do the intro.
>> Dave: It's time now for the Kroger Story of the week.
>> Darin: Okay, thanks. Right before I came here tonight, I ran by Kroger to get some drinks because we're out of drinks at the house and like, liquor? No, no, no, no. we like to drink the sparkling ice, and we like to drink the black raspberry flavored sparkling ice drinks.
>> Mike: Specific. Yeah.
>> Darin: And we get the, we get the 12 pack at Kroger. They're on sale for 9.99.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And we were almost out, so I went by. I, ran by there real quick. I pull into my parking space, and as I'm walking in, there is a car that has the door open, the lights on, but ain't nobody in the car.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: Which I thought was sus. That's what the kids call suspicious.
>> Mike: Yeah. Or suspect.
>> Darin: Seemed a bit odd to me. And I walked around the car to see if, you know, somebody might be in the backseat asleep. I don't know what I was looking for. Ain't nobody in the car. And then I hung around for a little bit thinking somebody was loading the car and was putting their card away. Nobody was doing that either.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: So I am a good person. I'm like, you, could report this or you could just not report it. And this is going to be the time that I don't report it. And this is like an abduction.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Right. In my mind, I go to somebody loading their car. Hey, can you help me? The same. Hey, I've got this cat in my backseat. Can you get it?
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And then they, they get in the movies.
>> Mike: Yeah. Somebody's asking for help or trying to. And they're in the. And George Clooney, he's always in the trunk.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: And he gets a Pez dispenser. He's able to flick it with his teet.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: And then somebody walking by hears that and then calls the popo.
>> Darin: Yeah. So I go into the store and I go up to the customer service desk and there's a guy, who I see there all the time. And I said, I don't know what you can do about this, but I noticed that there's a car and it's got the door open, the lights on, nobody there. And he goes, huh? M m, m. He goes, that's odd. I said.
>> Mike: That's what I said.
>> Darin: And then he calls over the manager and he says, there's a gentleman here. He noticed that there's a car in the parking lot. The door's open, the lights on, nobody's in there. And he goes, All three of Us are, like, rubbing our chins. This is odd.
>> Mike: Clearly, this is not in the emergency, preparedness plan.
>> Darin: Right. So the manager of the store calls one of the other managers and says, can you go out in the parking lot and check this car? It's a white Toyota RAV4, and it's near where the carts are parked.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: A manager and two bag boys are out there, and they're looking all over, trying to. I don't know. They're, like, being detectives. Yeah, they're looking. They're looking at the ground. They're walking around, like, seeing if they can find any clues as what's going on.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Then I walk back out because I bought my drinks, and the four of us are talking, and we come to the conclusion that maybe they should make an announcement. The owner of this car, please come to the front. Right.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And if they don't, then call the popo, call the police. Right. And they thought that's what we're going to do.
>> Mike: That's what they do at the Frisch's, Big Boy.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: What?
>> Mike: I'm just saying. I have. I know a guy. I know the procedures.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: That's what they do.
>> Darin: So they had just decided they were going to go back in when the owner of the car comes up and looks at us like, what's going on? And he says, did I leave my door open?
>> Mike: And now he's confused, like.
>> Darin: And I just wanted to ask him. I can see leaving your lights on.
How do you accidentally leave the door not cracked wide open at a supermarket
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: How do you accidentally leave the door not cracked wide open? I mean, absolutely. As open as it can get.
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
>> Darin: And he just smells, like, so stupid.
>> Mike: Hurt. Hurt her.
>> Darin: Yeah. And the two bad boys and the other, grocery store manager all looking at him like, okay. Yeah, yeah. So the good news is nobody was abducted. The bad news is there's just some weird guy who forgets to close his door, and he goes to grocery stores.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Dave: This has been the Kroger story of the week.
Couple things. One is, I want to talk about your drinks
>> Mike: Couple things. One is, I want to talk about your drinks.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: the sparkling ice. Raspberry, Black Raspberry. Is that the sole drink in your household or are there others that you.
>> Darin: That's our favorite, favorite flavor of the sparkling ice. The fruit punch is really good, but they don't sell the fruit punch in the 12 pack. They sell it in the variety pack. And when you get the variety pack, you have to get three lemonades, three mango lime, three something else, and three fruit punch. And we're not a real big fan of the lemonade and the mango lime. We. It's like, I just. If I could get 12 of the fruit punches, I'd buy that.
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah. So we got the Costco membership.
>> Darin: Right. Got one too.
>> Mike: And we went. And there's different versions of this water with essence that I've poo pooed for years.
>> Mike: But I'm like, is it lacrosse? Well, that's. That's the one that I liked. And then there's you like lacrosse, the bubble. And then now there's one at Michael, which is Winchester's water or something like that. But you know, when you buy from Costco, you're getting like three cases of water at once. You can't like just 75 of them in there.
>> Darin: Get to buy 200 bottles of water.
>> Mike: And it's frustrating because they'll have a good flavor, like peach. And then they'll have like blueberry lemonade, which is not. No, those two flavors don't go together well. And like rat fur, just like these other flavors that nobody wants in. So there's 75 cans. They've got the 25 of the peach, which is amazing.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: it's like peach soda. And it's. It's tastes so different that you actually begin to think there's sugar and stuff in there. It's. It messes with your head. It's weird.
>> Darin: Lacroix.
>> Mike: No, no, no, no, no. It's Winchester or Wyatt. Earps water. I don't know what it is. It's over there.
>> Darin: Wyatt Herbs.
>> Mike: It's got. They got like a harp and a beaver on the front of it.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: but they'll have 25 of those then like I said, the other 25 are rat fur and cow patty flavor.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And then so now we've got a bunch of those in our garage and around. Because nobody's drinking those things.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: And then the other day as. Actually a few weeks ago, Charlie wanted those fruit barrels. Remember those? Yeah, yeah. Hugs. yeah. So you don't buy those unless you're buying them for one of your kids or you're a psychopath. Like a grown person doesn't go in and buy these bear. If you. Okay. If you are in a relationship with someone and you don't have kids and you open the fridge and there's those fruit barrels in there.
>> Darin: There's a problem.
>> Mike: You're at that moment a timer starts.
>> Darin: Check the garage, make sure there's not a white fan.
>> Mike: You've got 10 seconds exactly. Get the hell out get the dive through a window if you have to.
>> Darin: Uh-huh. Stop dropping roll.
>> Mike: If you drove there, leave your car. I'm wondering, does that happen with this guy?
>> Darin: I don't know.
>> Mike: Maybe somebody had the barrels and he just, like, bolted and then he decided to come back. No, he was at Kroger's.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Cut all that.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: My point is, get the hell away from a grown person that doesn't have kids, that has the hugs.
>> Darin: Yeah. Kind of like one of them. Like the sippy cups, the fruit punch.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: what are those called?
>> Mike: It's like. I know.
>> Darin: A juice box. A juice with the straw that you could never get in there.
You can almost see. Something's about to happen. Get out. Leave the city. Leave your life behind. Have your bag ready in the
>> Mike: You can almost see. I could get. I could get by with a juice box. But a hug, that's committing.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: To a level of insanity. It's almost like those. You know that candy that was like little wax pop bottles.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: With like a squirt of, backwash. Kool Aid.
>> Darin: Just a hint.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: like half of what you would put in a stick of gum.
>> Mike: Now, as a kid, those are. That's bartering. That's. You got five of those. You can have anything you want. Trade them with another kid.
>> Darin: Really?
>> Mike: Those are amazing. Really?
>> Darin: No, like those.
>> Mike: If you see an adult sitting in on a park bench, eating those things. Wide berth. Wide berth. Leave the city. Get away from that person. Something's about to happen.
>> Darin: Have your bag ready in the ceiling.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: Maduro. Ron Swanson. She's here.
>> Mike: Oh, yeah.
>> Darin: And bust it. And get out.
>> Mike: Get out.
>> Darin: Keep like, $5,000 cash.
>> Mike: You're about to become casualty.
>> Mike: Uh-huh. So you need to leave that situation.
>> Darin: You have your fake ID and your passport.
>> Mike: Leave your life behind. It wasn't worth living anyway if your choices brought you within 10ft of someone like that.
>> Darin: Pull a Walter White and go stay at a cabin in Vermont.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Spoiler alert, by the way.
>> Mike: Exactly.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Was it Vermont?
>> Darin: Yeah. He was in Vermont. He went from New Mexico to Vermont. And how he got back to. I can't remember how he got back to New Mexico. Such a good show. That was a great show.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Dave: you're listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.
>> Mike: Hey, folks, for the money you're paying.
>> Darin: This is a riot.
>> Mike: That's right.
Domino's now offers an emergency pizza that you can cash in on anytime
>> Darin: I want to talk about something that I think is just really stupid.
>> Mike: Okay. That's new for this show.
>> Darin: Perfect for this show.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I saw a commercial for Domino's. It's a pizza place.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And they've got this thing now where you Order a, Domino's pizza. And what they do is they give you an emergency pizza Whip an emergency pizza that you can cash in on any time that you need an emergency pizza. Okay, I'm, confused. That's not, Okay, so you decide you order a pizza.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And you basically get a free one anytime that you want to get it. Right. Anytime that you want to order your extra pizza, your emergency pizza, you can. Anytime you want. The commercial.
>> Mike: Can't you order a pizza anytime you.
>> Darin: Want anyway you can. So what is right. Okay, A. Exhibit A, your honor. Yes. Exhibit B. Uh-huh. The commercial is stupid.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: A woman, I think it's a woman, is walking down the street and she has all her groceries in two bags. And the bags come open and her groceries pour out on the sidewalk. And she looks at the camera like.
>> Mike: Yeah, I guess I'll just buy it.
>> Darin: Better get the emergency pizza. or you could pick your groceries up off the ground, you lazy.
>> Mike: Or order a normal pizza.
>> Darin: Just like, I can seriously just see me going to the grocery store, and then I come home empty handed and I tell my wife, we're ordering our emergency pizza. And she said, why are we doing that? Oh, because I dropped my groceries on the ground and I'm such a fat, lazy slob, I didn't stop to pick them up. Hey, what happened?
>> Mike: So let me ask you.
>> Darin: There's a second example. Hold it.
>> Mike: Hold your question.
>> Darin: Hold your question.
>> Mike: you'll take questions at the end?
>> Darin: We'll take questions.
>> Mike: Thank you.
>> Darin: A person gets in a car accident.
>> Mike: Boom.
>> Darin: Oh, better order the emergency pizza.
>> Mike: Was that. It was not in the commercial.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: No, it wasn't.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: And he's just sitting there like, well, I guess I better order my emergency pizza.
>> Mike: Oh, my God.
>> Darin: Or you could go to the emergency room.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And see if your neck is broken. I don't know, but it's just dumb.
>> Mike: See? Okay.
>> Darin: So stupid.
>> Mike: I'm not somebody that pines for the days of old because I like. I like new things.
>> Darin: Like that expression.
>> Mike: Yes, yes. But back in the day, what happened? What was wrong with the noid? Avoid the noid. Avoid the like. What was wrong with that? Bring him back.
>> Darin: Nothing.
>> Mike: He was perfect.
>> Darin: Yes. Yeah. That's what you're telling me.
>> Mike: You gotta leave him in the vault, but you're bringing out emergency pizza? Because everything you just said. Take out the word emergency. Huh? Just order a pizza. Yeah, yeah, Order a pizza.
>> Darin: Just order a pizza.
>> Mike: Or handle your business. Pick up your groceries.
>> Darin: Pick up your groceries.
>> Mike: Handle. Give the person your insurance information. Seriously, talk to the police.
>> Darin: Seriously. The woman probably had 60 bucks worth of groceries on the sidewalk.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: All you gotta do is pick them up.
Every pizza is an emergency at Marco's. The only place you intend to have a pizza
>> Mike: Every pizza is an emergency. Pizza.
>> Darin: I know.
>> Mike: Nobody intends to have a pizza. It just. Nobody plans. The only place.
>> Darin: Nobody intends to.
>> Mike: The only place.
>> Darin: You know we order a pizza every Friday night. We have for years.
>> Mike: The only place you intend to have a pizza.
>> Darin: Uh-huh.
>> Mike: You actually order one. And like we're going to have a pizza is. And this is a local thing, is the mellow mushroom. Because if you walk in there at 6:00 and you order a pizza at 6:05, you'll get your pizza maybe by 8:00. Maybe.
>> Darin: I've been there. I've been there once.
>> Mike: Oh, you're there all evening when I go there.
>> Darin: And I was okay with my one time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
>> Mike: I'm good.
>> Darin: So. No, we get a pizza at Marco's every Friday night for years. Yeah, right there at the thing. And it's one of those situations where there was one Friday night where we didn't go. And Saturday morning they called to me make sure you're. They called to make sure everything was okay.
>> Mike: Proof of life.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: All right. There.
>> Mike: That's what's gonna happen. That's. That's how they're gonna. That's how they're gonna find me. They're. The Kroger. It's gonna be in the spring and the. One of the Kroger's guys is gonna come by. Like, we got stacks and stacks of peeps just waiting for Mike to come by. Bess is gonna be like, oh, he fell down the stairs.
>> Darin: I think Gary at Marco's is probably going to deliver my eulogy.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Mr. Cox was a good guy. Yeah, we saw him every Friday night. My name is on the wall.
>> Mike: Would he throw. What do you think he would throw toppings down on your coffee?
>> Darin: Mike, put.
>> Mike: Throw a few pepperoni down.
>> Darin: He'll put what we have on ground beef.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Pepperoni.
>> Mike: Uh-huh.
>> Darin: Black olive, extra cheese. That's what's going to be on my casket.
>> Mike: He should just sprinkle. Yeah, great. Throw some cheesy bread on top of it. It's like the one the coins in the eyes for the river sticks, guys. Yeah.
>> Darin: Just like some cheesy bread. Put pepperoni on my eyes.
>> Mike: There you go. There you go.
>> Darin: Good times.
>> Mike: M. What?
>> Darin: Did you watch that? I'm going to use quotation. It's an audio podcast.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Did you watch the fight on Netflix.
>> Mike: Yeah. The Jake we did.
>> Darin: Was it Paul Ryan?
>> Mike: You know Paul Ryan? Jacob. Jacob. Paul.
>> Darin: Jake, Paul. And mighty Mike Tyson.
>> Mike: I didn't. I didn't. I agree with one our attorney posted the next day, and I think it was our attorney. Yeah. Said, I would have liked to have seen training Mike.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And I see.
>> Darin: I would have liked to have seen.
>> Mike: Training Paul, the organizer. I have no ill will towards Mike Tyson.
Jacob: I love Mike Tyson. I remember the Buster Douglas fight. Buster Douglas knocked out Tyson
I love Mike Tyson. No ill will. None.
>> Darin: He's not an outstanding citizen in my opinion.
>> Mike: Okay. He owns.
>> Darin: He served his time.
>> Mike: Yeah. He owns a company that sells gummy ears, and he got Evander Holyfield to do commercials with him for the gummy ear company. so.
>> Darin: Wow. Money. M Talks money.
>> Mike: Yeah. They seem to legitimately enjoy each other's company. but I think here's the deal. The people that put the fight together. Oh, me and all the other dads our age. Ah. Of Gen X who spent weeks telling their kids, oh, Tyson used to come out. I remember back in 93, he, Or whenever it was, he clocked the guy. He, like, the bell rang, he come out, he hit the dude, and the dude was on the ground. The fight was over before the bell was done ringing.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: It was literally.
>> Darin: Yes. As my dad would say. There was two hits. He hit him, hit the ground.
>> Mike: Boom. Yeah, yeah. And it was awesome. And he looked mad. He was always mad.
>> Darin: I remember the Buster Douglas fight.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: My girlfriend and I at the time were getting ready to go out.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And, just a second.
>> Mike: There's a fight on. Hold on.
>> Darin: Next. Yeah, next on HBO.
>> Mike: Yeah. And we looked.
>> Darin: We're like, we've got 20 minutes before the movie starts.
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Watch the fight. And then maybe another 19 minutes of shorts and then whatever.
>> Darin: So we're like, okay, we'll watch the fight real quick and then go to this movie.
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.
>> Darin: We missed the. We went to the next one, but still we're like, holy crap. Buster Douglas knocked out Tyson.
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
>> Darin: But no, there was more hugging than anything. My God, they were just hug.
>> Mike: So. Yeah. Best. Best. One of the kids was like, why are they doing that? And I'm like, well, usually in heavyweight, I mean, they're. They're like, just because they're tired or whatever, it's like a way to.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Just getting. But it was, like, right at the beginning, and then there was a point, like 10 or 15 seconds in where it's like Tyson decided, I'm gonna mop the floor with him, and ran over there, threw a couple punches, and Then that was. That was pretty much it.
>> Darin: Yep, yep.
>> Mike: So it was like the Rocky Balboa. The fight at the end of Rocky.
>> Darin: Balboa without all the excitement.
>> Mike: Well, yeah, yeah. Like, because the whole thing of Rocky Balboa is just. He made it all the rounds. Yeah.
>> Darin: With the.
>> Mike: Went the distance. Yeah, yeah.
>> Darin: So, our Netflix kept buffering and buffering.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: And buffering. It was driving us crazy.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Jacob kept. It's like you.
>> Mike: Did you have it going through a device or through your tv?
>> Darin: Through our tv. Through Samsung.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: Samsung tv. So we're almost at the point you go and smack. Remember, you could smack your TV and it would come back in. That was the days where you'd hold your, antenna and that would help it come in.
Jacob says watching the fight on TikTok was better than watching the actual fight
And Jacob's talking to the tv. Please. Like, Jacob, that doesn't. That doesn't help the tv. but he would exit out of Netflix. Because sometimes you exit out of Netflix. Sometimes if you unplug your Roku box and plug it back in, sometimes that helps. But nothing was helping. And finally Libby dialed it up and, came in fine on her phone. So we start watching it on the phone I had. I was like, this is boring. And I went in the other room, and I was searching through TikTok and somebody was live streaming the fight on their Tick Tock page, which is illegal. Yeah, Right.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And this is. This was better than the fight because the guy says, they're about to shut us down here. So, yeah, if you want to order the massager, what you can do is go to our TikTok shop now and order the massager and let us know what you think about our massager. And all these comments started coming in. I ordered my massager last week, and I love it. And then it's like, hey, if you do increase the heat on yours, and it really does the trick. all these people are commenting about this massager.
>> Mike: Got the algorithm off their ass there. Yeah.
>> Darin: And I chimed in, I'm like, I bought mine and I got the second one free, you know, and it was. All these people talk about this nonsense thing so they could watch it. Yeah, I'm like, it. again, that was better than watching the actual fight. So, Yeah, I don't know what made Jake want to fight Tyson.
>> Mike: Oh, for the Cloud or whatever, but, you know.
>> Darin: And okay, another question. Why was Rosie Perez there? Since when was she a boxing commentator? Yeah, she's famous in the Letterman community because she always talked about her Isuzu. Trooper. Okay, go on Google or YouTube. And look up Rosie Perez, Isuzu Trooper. It's hysterical hearing her talk about her Isuzu Trooper. But anyway, Rosie Perez had said if Jake Paul loses, then he loses the fight. If he wins, he was like, way to go. You beat a 58 year old man.
>> Mike: Oh, I love the memes that have come out.
>> Darin: Jake Paul pushes George Foreman down a flight of stairs.
>> Mike: There was one of him like, challenging Aragorn. Because Aragorn's 210 years old.
>> Darin: I don't know.
>> Mike: There's one for him and Jimmy Carter.
>> Darin: Oh, my God.
>> Mike: Saw the other day, that's.
>> Darin: I missed the undercard fight with the women. And I heard, oh, that was brutal. What I heard, it was amazing.
>> Mike: That was Mortal Kombat. That was as close to like an actual action movie. Like how the boxing matches are in the Rocky movies, right? Was they were out for, blood, up for blood. And the one, the, the Irish woman was headbutting. Yeah, the other one. And it was done.
>> Darin: I was bleeding.
>> Mike: Yeah, it was done all sneaky like too, because I didn't notice it. I was too busy looking back at best saying, this is brutal. Yeah, is this brutal? And Bess was like, it's brutal. Like, that's brutal. You think we were next to Charlie brutal. Dad, he was asleep. He slept through the entire thing. But yeah, she would punch and miss and then come in and whammo with the, with her forehead, right? And it was interesting because when they were doing a little commentary afterwards and talking to her, she said something about it and, nobody seemed to want to hear what she had to say. But then the other lady with the old big old thing gusher coming out of her eye, which made it really hard to eat my popcorn while that was going on. See, people were cheering and she was talking.
>> Darin: Who did the head butt? Yeah, she lost the fight, right?
>> Mike: No, she won.
>> Darin: Oh, she ended up winning.
>> Mike: She won. But now I just saw something today. They're talking about revoking something like she's been suspended. She can't fight for X number of months or something.
>> Darin: Okay, we'll let you win the fight. But now you're.
>> Mike: Yeah, you bad. Oh, naughty, naughty. Yeah, still got the belt.
>> Darin: Yeah, you know, slap on the wrist. Yeah.
>> Dave: Hi, everybody, it's your old buddy Dave. Christmas is coming up and, boy, do I have exciting news for you. Go to irritabledadsyndrome.com and you'll notice fantastic prices on all our merchandise. We've got coffee mugs, beer glasses, hoodies, venomous beaver T shirts, Whomper's all beef, foot long hot dog, beach blankets, and much more. Enjoy Black Friday prices all month long, so get a special gift for that special someone in your life.
Steve Farrell has been a fan of this podcast since day one
Right now@inritabledadsyndrome.com I want to talk about Steve Farrell.
>> Darin: Steve Farrell has been.
>> Mike: Son of a bitch.
>> Darin: He has been a fan of this podcast since day one.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: Okay. And, he and I, we went to college together. I've known him for a very, very, very long time. Yeah, he's a funny guy. He used to write all kinds of funny things on the Twitter, back when it was called Twitter. And then he would. The same stuff he would put over onto the Facebook page.
>> Mike: Can't hold a cover image to save his life.
>> Darin: Every five minutes.
>> Mike: Yeah, every five minutes.
>> Darin: So many years ago, he wrote a joke, and it was, I saw a guy buying one roll of toilet paper, and I was like, what are you trying to do, quit? Funny joke. Yeah, really funny joke. I asked him, I said, hey, when I do stand up this next time, do you care if I use that joke in my standard routine? Not a problem. There's two jokes that I didn't write that I use in my routine. That one and another friend of mine, also named Steve, coincidentally, never get tattoos on your knuckles, especially ones that say coal and slaw.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Okay. So I use those when I do, stand up. Hilarious.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And then Dave Lay did the. Dave's Comedy Corner, the joke about toilet paper. What are you trying to do, quit? Okay, two days ago, I'm at the house and I'm scrolling, and I see this comedian. Almost word for word, he says, I saw a guy, you know, you can buy the four pack or the eight pack of toilet paper. It's like, I saw a guy buying one, and I'm like, what are you trying to do? Quit?
>> Mike: Son of a bitch. So you messaged him immediately.
>> Darin: Well, I mean, what do you do?
>> Mike: Yeah. You don't have any recordings of you doing that, do you?
>> Darin: Yeah, I do. Oh, I do have a recording of me.
>> Mike: Do you put on the Facebooks? yes, Those automatically date.
>> Darin: Yeah, you could.
>> Mike: You gotta. It sounds like we've got a. Well, dad lawsuit pen name.
>> Darin: What we need to do is,
>> Mike: We'Ve got an attorney. We've got representation.
>> Darin: That's right. Steve needs to go back and find when he wrote it on his Twitter page, because that goes back years, before I used it.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: But I'm like, there's no way this guy accidentally wrote the same joke there. Almost word Almost the same delivery, the same enunciation. What are you trying to do, quit?
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: The pause falls in the same.
>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.
>> Darin: and you go through the comments on this, like, oh, God, the delivery. That joke was hilarious. One of the funniest jokes I've ever heard. People loving this.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I think this guy stole Steve's joke.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Now you can say I stole it. I borrowed it with permission.
>> Mike: Yeah. You rented it.
>> Darin: I asked him and he kindly let me.
>> Mike: That's allowed. I think that's allowed.
>> Darin: Exactly.
>> Mike: A gentleman's agreement.
>> Darin: Yes. And Steve and I are nothing if not gentlemen.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: The other day, Cameron went to see a friend of his, and he was over there at his friend's house. And I go to pick him up, and Cameron puts on shoes. We're getting ready to leave, and I'm talking to the parents and the dad, who I've only met one other time.
>> Darin: Comes over and he says, hey, Darren, how you doing? I said, good. He's good to see you. And he reaches out to shake my hand, and he doesn't do the hand straight forward. He does the hand that goes.
>> Mike: Oh, around. Oh, that's not around. Yeah.
>> Darin: The round the world hands. Is that what you call it?
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And our fingers connected.
>> Mike: Yeah.
Shane says he accidentally gave the proposal handshake
>> Darin: But not the palm. Into the palm.
>> Mike: Did you hear the tender piano music in the background when that happens?
>> Darin: That's. I heard Michael Buble.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And so. And that was the handshake. And then I'm like, well, I gotta go.
>> Mike: What do you. Yeah.
>> Darin: And I got in the car, and then I'm just bothered. And I asked Cameron, like, do I need to go in and redo that? He says, I mean, if you want. But I'm like, so now either this guy didn't notice or he thinks that I have a sissy handshake.
>> Mike: Yeah. I mean, I maybe.
>> Darin: I mean, maybe he has a sissy handshake. I don't know.
>> Mike: Have you ever given the. Accidentally given the proposal handshake?
>> Darin: What's the proposal?
>> Mike: Handshake.
>> Darin: Handshake.
>> Mike: I'm not gonna do it. It was a similar situation. Shaking hands with somebody, their hand wasn't the right way. Uh-huh. And it ended up being one of these.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: You ever had one of those?
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: The next step is to go down on your knee and profess your admiration. Yes.
>> Darin: Yeah. That was almost the handshake that we had. And I don't want people thinking that I'm some macho.
>> Mike: You gave him the thumb and, Louise.
>> Darin: That'S not a handshake.
>> Mike: It's not a. Yeah. The purpose of a handshake is to shake hands. To shake hands, not to shake your fingers. There's the social. You've got to like. You gotta have a firm, but not too firm. You tell a lot about another person.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: By how they shake your hand.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Like if you get one of these, you're m about to be asked if you want to join them in holy matrimony.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Right. M. Now, the last time I met him and we shook hands, that was a real handshake.
>> Mike: Well, okay, so you've got one in the books already.
>> Darin: Now we're one and one.
>> Mike: You've escalated at this point. Are you going steady at this point?
>> Darin: I don't know. I don't think so.
>> Mike: Are you allowed to shake other men's hands?
>> Darin: I should have just went and redone it.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I want to redo. And now I'm like, I'm trapped in the middle of a Seinfeld episode. Why would he shake my hand like that?
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
>> Darin: That's not how you shake hands.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: That's not what you do.
>> Mike: Ah, the thumb groove has to hook to the thumb. Yeah, that's what that's there for.
>> Darin: The groove of the thumb hits the groove of the thumb.
>> Mike: That's. That's why that's there.
>> Darin: So, Jerry, you got the proposal? I got the proposal. Shane.
>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.
>> Darin: What am I doing?
>> Mike: okay.
>> Darin: You want me to stop? It's either that or Ray Romano.
>> Mike: Why would you shake your hand like that? Yeah.
Dave Lay: We're going to see Interstellar on December 6th
>> Dave: this portion of our show is brought to you by Whomper's All Beef Footlong Hot Dogs. Hi, I'm Dave Lay. Are you tired of buying mediocre brand hot dogs that claim to be a foot long, but in actuality are only around 11 inches long? That seriously pisses me off. It's like, hey, who you trying to screw here, pal? Get a ruler and measure it yourself. If you find a Whompers hot dog that isn't a foot long, they'll refund your money, guaranteed.
>> Darin: That's right.
>> Dave: Whompers, America's favorite footlong hot dog. Get your Whompers All Beef Foot Long T shirt now@inritabledadsyndrome.com.
>> Mike: We'Re going to go see Interstellar. December 6th, one day only. It's in. Have you heard about this?
>> Darin: They're in theaters. They're releasing.
>> Mike: Re. Release it in theaters in the imax. It's, Andrew's favorite movie.
>> Darin: Oh, okay.
>> Mike: Yeah. So we're all gonna.
>> Darin: All right.
>> Mike: Well, by all, I mean me And Andrew, I don't know if Bess. Charlie will probably come. I don't know if Bess will come.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: But, yeah, I'm all. I'm all down for that.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: Has nothing to do with anything we've talked about.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: We'll talk about. Or the rest of the.
>> Darin: But a lot of people consider that one of his greatest movies.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I mean, I still think Memento is his greatest movie.
>> Mike: Christopher Nolan.
>> Darin: Christopher Nolan.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I love Memento more than any of them. More than I watch Oppenheimer, more than, the. What's the one before Oppenheimer?
>> Mike: Jingle, jangle jingle all the way. Yeah.
>> Darin: no, the one that Tenet. Tenet.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Boy, I tried.
>> Mike: You need a degree. I watched.
>> Darin: Yeah, you really, really. You need like, Cliff Notes and a translator.
>> Mike: Just the other day on the Tick Tock. You've heard of the Tick Tock? I saw the most useless video I think I've ever seen in my life. It had a little. Little thing said. Christopher Nolan explains Memento. Huh? Uh-huh. And he's at a chalkboard.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And I swear I thought this was a Saturday Night Live thing or a skit, but it wasn't. It was real.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: He draws an arrow that comes around and then goes back this way.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And two lines. And he said, And it's. He's like, okay, the black and white points backwards go. Or I'm sorry. The color go forward in time. The black and white go backwards. So the end of the movie is in the middle where they meet.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And we just alternate going through. And I'm like, yeah. Everybody who's satisfied in the movie for more than 15 minutes has got that figured out. Knows that. And then he looks at the camera and says, and that's Memento.
>> Darin: And it was actually. It was Christopher Nolan.
>> Mike: It was Christopher Nolan.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And I'm like, wow. Yeah, that's. I don't.
>> Darin: Yeah, he, somebody. Because I owned it on the. On DVD. Then like 10 or 15 years after I bought it on DVD, they rereleased a special edition and it has an option where you can watch it in chronological order.
>> Mike: Yeah, we have that.
The movie skips chapters and it's annoying. It's not the movie in chronological order
We have that one. Yeah.
>> Darin: And that's where there's a major flaw.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: If you watch it and it doesn't. It's not the movie in chronological order. It skips chapters and it's annoying.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Very annoying.
>> Darin: So anyway, it's.
>> Mike: Well, you can YouTube. They've got it on YouTube. You can just thing like that.
>> Darin: So it's doing that. It's skipping the chapters. It's showing everything in chronological order. And then you notice he remembers something. Yeah. And he ain't got no short term memory. And so you put these clips one after another and they're like, holy crap. How did he know that? Well, he remembered something.
>> Mike: Yeah. There's a couple theories about the movie. One is that he's faking it so that he can do whatever he wants and he doesn't care. And the other is that Teddy is using him. I think that's the actual. Supposed to be the plot of the thing. His. Teddy has been using him to kill people. And then he decides that Teddy is bad and that's why Teddy gets killed, why he kills dead.
>> Darin: Interesting. Interesting. Yeah, I mean, I. I know it's a movie.
>> Mike: Teddy is Joe Joey Pants.
>> Darin: Joey Pants. Joe Pantaleano.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Yeah. I don't think he was faking it.
>> Mike: I don't think he was either. Yeah, I don't think he was either.
>> Darin: Yeah. It's a great movie though. And I was so pissed that it lost the Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay.
>> Mike: Well, who won?
>> Darin: I don't remember. It wasn't Memento. It should have been. But no, because, Stevie. What's his name? The director?
>> Mike: Stevie Wonder. No, Stevie McQueen.
>> Darin: Stevie Nicks, the director of Memento. Nolan. Christopher Nolan.
>> Mike: Stevie Nolan. Yeah.
>> Darin: Steve Nolan finally won an Academy Award. Two of them. And then his wife, who she, won on. And also because they co wrote Oppenheimer together.
>> Mike: John Jacob Oppenheimer.
>> Darin: Oppenheimer Schmidt. Yeah. just so long overdue. Yeah, but he should have won for Memento. They need to go back and render that mistake.
>> Mike: Bess and I watched, Inglourious Basterds and I'm here to report that Bess liked it a lot.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: So our first movie that we ever saw together, our first date was m going to see Pulp Fiction in the theater.
>> Darin: Oh, okay.
>> Mike: That. So any of you Gen Z or Millennials? That's how old, you might know.
>> Darin: How to treat a lady.
>> Mike: Yeah. Oh, and I. We went to Burger King right after and I got her a Whopper.
>> Darin: That's what she said. Wow.
>> Mike: Yeah. Or I got myself a Whopper. I don't know what she got.
>> Darin: Did you. You bought her food though, right?
>> Mike: I think so. Yeah, I did. I did. I'm. I'm old fashioned. But I found out years later that she wasn't really. She didn't really like that movie that much, but she, you know, because we were.
M. M.: We watched it for obvious reasons
It was Our first date, like, anytime I would bring up a Tarantino movie, she never wanted to see him. She would watch part of them. They're too violent. But this one, yeah. M. We watched it for obvious reasons. The time we're in, like, let's just. Let's. You'll. You'll enjoy it.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: And she thought it was great. So I've, like, I've got a doorway in for other Tarantino movies.
>> Darin: I'm gonna have to try it again because I did Libby and I did not enjoy it when we watched.
>> Mike: You did not like. You didn't like. No. You just don't like Tarantino.
>> Darin: I do like Tarantino. He's very hit and miss with me. I told you many times on this podcast that like many of his movies, I do like the other ones.
>> Mike: Ah, yeah, Yeah.
M. M. had an experience at Walmart the other day
>> Dave: M. M. Time now for the Walmart.
>> Mike: Story of the week.
>> Darin: I had an experience at Walmart the other day. I rarely Breaking Bad Walmart or the Breaking Bad Walmart. I rarely ever go into Walmart. But I went in there to pick up something for my mom, okay. And I cannot find this thing that she needs, so I asked somebody for help. Can you tell me where this thing is? Yeah, I'm gonna be secret about the thing.
>> Mike: Colored weed whacker.
>> Darin: M. No. I'm going to be very secretive, and people are going to be like, my God, what is he getting for his mother? This thing that I needed. I asked this woman, can you tell me where this thing is? She m. Looks at me and she holds up her phone to my face and she says, speak. And I said, thing, Right? The thing that I'm looking for. And then she looks and she goes, G. 1, 2. So it's on ILG. And she says, she nods her head up and down.
>> Mike: Like, did she reach in and pull her face off to reveal a lizard person?
>> Darin: Not like, V. So I said, it's on Ilg. And she says, nods her head up and down. I look up, we're on F. Okay.
>> Mike: Which is just right next door.
>> Darin: So G should be right over there. So I point to my. Use my right hand. This is an audio podcast. So this way. And she keeps doing her head up and down.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Okay. So I did.
>> Mike: She worked there.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: Okay. She had the best.
>> Darin: She had the best. If she didn't work, she. She went to the mop sink, punched somebody else, stole their vest, and was acting like a Walmart employee.
>> Mike: I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna wear a vest to Walmart. Just wear a blue vest, hold a Phone up. Speak.
>> Darin: Speak. So I leave aisle F. Yeah. And I look over, and the next style I see is H. Yeah. H. F. Go from F. That's not how that works. Skip G. And, you go to H. My question is, what the hell? And I walk down and I walk. And I'm looking.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I'm using my eyes, and I cannot find aisle G. Is this like the.
>> Mike: 9 1/3 Harry Potter? You've got to jump into a middle.
>> Darin: That's exactly what I thought.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: So I find the little gnome, opens.
>> Mike: A little door at the bottom of F. Come on in here. We've got things.
>> Darin: I find another employee.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: This is where I'm going to be very sensitive.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: Because this man, as nice as can be.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: Did not speak very good English.
>> Mike: Okay. Don't have that.
>> Darin: He did not speak very good English.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I asked him.
>> Mike: I said, neither did the previous one, by the way.
>> Darin: You don't know speak maybe the only word she knew.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Again, I'm being very sensitive.
>> Mike: You should have barked when she said that.
>> Darin: I should have wagged my tail. No, not sit.
>> Mike: The aisle and then go talk to the next.
>> Darin: So I go up to this, second gentleman who. An employee there. Again, very nice. I said, I'm looking for aisle G. And he looks kind of confused, and I said, I'm looking for aisle G. And he says, G. I said, yes.
>> Mike: He thought you were calling him G. Yes.
>> Darin: G. Aisle G. I need aisle G. Goes, come. And he starts walking. Come?
>> Mike: Yeah. Okay, Come.
>> Darin: So I got one woman saying, speak, and another guy saying, come.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: So they all think I'm, a dog.
>> Mike: Yeah. They're gonna put a leash on you.
I have bad experience at Walmart. I try not to go in Walmart ever
>> Darin: He walks and walks and walks toward the back of the store, and then he points and he goes, g, G, G, G. I said, okay. And I walk over, and now I'm in J.
>> Mike: It's gonna say, now you're in a different story.
>> Darin: Not G. That's J.
>> Mike: Is it the garden department?
>> Darin: No, no. I'm in boots and I'm in footwear.
>> Mike: Lord.
>> Darin: So I find you're in the third employee. A third employee.
>> Mike: Uh-huh.
>> Darin: This is some kid with bangs. I'm like, oh, my God.
>> Mike: You know, he doesn't know anything.
>> Darin: I have never had somebody who looks like this person know what they're doing.
>> Mike: Okay?
>> Darin: And I have bad experience at Walmart. Walmart's the time. You know, I asked this guy said, do you sell buttermilk? I don't know.
>> Mike: And he kept walking.
>> Darin: So I asked this kid, I Said, I'm looking for aisle G, and I'm in J. I said I was on F. And I walked over, and there's H. So G is missing. Is this like one of these Harry Potter 9? And he starts laughing, goes, G is up at the front of the store near the pharmacy.
>> Mike: Oh, of course.
>> Darin: I'm like, thank you.
>> Mike: Yeah. Because pharmacy starts with F, then G is right there.
>> Darin: It starts with A.
>> Mike: That's why. I guess because you were in Walmart is why this happened.
>> Darin: I get to G. Yeah. I'm in G now.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And now I can't find the thing.
>> Mike: Okay. Did you ever remember what the thing is?
>> Darin: A fourth employee comes over, and I thought, what the hell?
>> Mike: They yell, how'd you get off your leash?
>> Darin: What the hell? Let's ask somebody else. And I said, I'm looking for this thing.
>> Darin: And she holds up the phone and says, speak. Oh, my gosh. And then I found it.
>> Mike: Uh-huh.
>> Darin: I bought it.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Probably gonna have to return it.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: But that was my experience at. Ah.
>> Mike: Wow. Oh, my Lord.
>> Dave: This has been the Walmart story of the week.
>> Mike: Yeah. I try not to go in Walmart ever.
>> Darin: I hate.
>> Mike: I get my eyes checked at Walmart. That's where I. That's where I go get my. My eye thing.
>> Darin: You go to the Vision center?
>> Mike: I do. I do. I've been going there for over a decade and lying to them the entire time. We talked about that the last. And I told him the truth this last time. And now I can. Can see. But, yeah, that's. That's the only reason I go there. There. That. And then when I had my issue, I had to poo. And what? When I had the hernia operation on my stomach.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: and then I was afraid to strain too much. I didn't want to explode.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: But, I had to poo. And I was constipated, and I just slammed an energy drink, and Bess took me to Walmart, and I was like, I. Walmart is a place where I was. I felt comfortable myself in public because I never go in there. We talked about it.
>> Darin: You just fit right in.
>> Mike: I just. Yeah. Nobody would bat an eye ball guy himself at ILG. Yeah.
>> Darin: You can't do that at, Target. no.
>> Mike: Target.
No. Any of those places is too small. Walmart, you could all over that store
No. They ban you. Your picture would be up on the front.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: cvs. Any of those places is too small.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: They never let you get away with it. Walmart, you could all over that store. They would just never know it. No. yeah, it's the only time I go there.
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For the past 231 weeks, I have been promoting my podcast on Facebook
>> Darin: So I want to bitch about something.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: I mentioned last week my friend Kurt had passed away. I, went to the funeral home a week early.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: I, went back, I went to the visitation, I saw his wife Susan, and then I went in and they had, like, the best pictures ever of. It was a very lovely tribute that they had for him. It was great. And I started talking to some of my old co workers from wlw. And how many episodes of this show have we done? 200.
>> Mike: This is 230.
>> Darin: 232.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And it's a bit. A lot of them, it's safe to say. I think I've promoted every one of them.
>> Mike: Uh-huh.
>> Darin: On my Facebook page.
>> Mike: Yeah, you do a good job.
>> Darin: Like almost every week, either I put something on my Facebook page that, hey, here's the latest episode. Or sometimes you sometimes. And tag me. And then it comes onto my.
>> Mike: Yes.
>> Darin: Yeah. So, for the past 231 weeks, I have been promoting my podcast on my Facebook page. a buddy of mine comes up to me and we're talking at the. At the funeral and he says, hey, you still doing the podcast? And I just. I just wanted to say.
>> Mike: See, I get that.
>> Darin: Are you kidding me?
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Are you kidding? Because he's on my Facebook page. We're Facebook friends. We've been Facebook friends longer than, I've had this podcast. Are you still doing the podcast? Yes, I am.
>> Mike: So, yeah, I've had to do one every week.
>> Darin: I do. I do one every week. Yes.
Are you still doing the podcast? That's a legitimate question
>> Mike: So I've gotten. How's the podcast going? That's a legitimate question.
>> Darin: That's a legit question. It's going great.
>> Mike: But are you still doing it?
>> Darin: Yeah. Are you still doing the podcast?
>> Mike: So two or three years ago. Well, maybe four years ago.
>> Darin: Do you put one out every week?
>> Mike: Every damn week. We had our seventh episode.
>> Darin: Mm Oh, I remember.
>> Mike: And it was our final episode.
>> Darin: Yeah. Cuz because many podcasts don't last past seven episodes.
>> Mike: So we announced it was our final episode, but we continued to go. There was a joke.
>> Darin: It was, it was episode eight.
>> Mike: Couple years passed by. I'm talking to somebody, one of my friends on Facebook and they're like, man, I really liked your podcast. It's a shame you stopped after seven episodes. And I had a couple of thoughts.
>> Darin: One is, we were like episode 47 or something.
>> Mike: One is, I would have understood if someone would have called us after our seventh episode and said, thank God you've stopped. If you've.
>> Darin: Oh yeah.
>> Mike: Our patrons have heard one through 24. They're not horrible.
>> Darin: They're not that bad.
>> Mike: They're good. If you know us. If you know us. But if you don't know us, you're like, what is this? But I had to point it out. No, we're still going. And at that time, I think we were in episode 120 something. And I linked it to him. I think I shamed them, you know? You know what I mean?
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: Like, you've done this many of these. I was like, yeah, we weren't really quitting.
>> Darin: It was all joke.
>> Mike: people in general are idiots. I've learned this, I have learned over.
>> Darin: The years that there are a lot of people who don't get me. Like, I'll be joking with somebody. I actually. Mike, when Was this? Early 2000s. Made an effort, an honest to God, valiant effort, to make a change about how I represented myself. Because I was so sarcastic, like a lot.
>> Mike: All the time. Yeah.
>> Darin: And maybe, maybe I was turning off.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: But there were people who could not take me seriously. and I couldn't have a serious discussion with people.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: You know, it's like. Well, I mean, I think that's stupid. Oh, Wacky Darren. Like, I'm not joking.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: And they didn't know when I was serious and when I was kidding around. so I seriously just got. I didn't get go. Super serious.
>> Mike: You just pulled it back a little.
>> Darin: I did. I pulled it back. And you know, a time and place for, you know, being yuck, yuck. And then another time to be, you know, just laid back and regular old Darren.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: This was not that.
>> Darin: but I thought for sure people knew we were joking. This is not.
>> Mike: Yeah, but, yeah, just of recent.
I watched an arrest video of a woman who wanted a discount
I've been thinking, there's a George Carlin quote. Think of how stupid the average person is and realize half of them are stupider than that. It's one of my favorite quotes of all time. I love that quote so much. stupider than that. It's really, it's true. It's literally true.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: But I've been watching some. So the algorithm we've talked about. I've watched different things on YouTube. The algorithm has started throwing up some, Some newer arrest videos. I watched an arrest video, at lunch today of a woman who was at a store and she wanted a discount. And so the video starts. It's the police. It's their body cam.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: And they go up to the store. One of the. The clerk. The head of the clerks. Not the store manager, but the clerk's manager.
>> Darin: The head of the clerk.
>> Mike: Head of the clerks.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And she says, this lady wants a discount. We don't, we can't offer her this discount. And she's refusing to leave. And the lady is sitting. I didn't even like, you know those places in the, like the carousel when you put your bag. Put stuff in your bag.
>> Darin: Yes.
>> Mike: She's sitting on that.
>> Darin: Okay.
>> Mike: And she's holding her phone. She's recording the police and this clerk. Manager.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And she says, I want my discount. That's. I just want my discount. It's 20% discount. And the cop says, well, they're, they're saying, you don't. They're not honoring the discount. I don't know what the discount. She says, well, my boyfriend works here. and he gets an employee discount. And he said, is he here now? No, he's not here now. I was like, well, you don't, you don't get the discount. And then the clerk manager said, you don't, you don't get the discount. You're not getting the discount. She's like, but my boyfriend works here. This is, it's a 20 minute video.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: That. All of that I just said is established within the first minute and a half.
>> Darin: And it just.
>> Mike: For the next 15 minutes, it's that argument all the way around.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And then she comes with an idea. Can you hold my stuff? And then we comes here, he can buy it. And they're like, we're not going to hold your stuff for you up here. We're not going to. And so finally, the cops say they want you trespassed out of here. if they decide to press charges, I have to arrest you because I've warned you to leave and you haven't. And you haven't. So the. He asked the clerk and they reserved.
>> Darin: And it's on the. They reserve the right anytime.
>> Mike: She did have shoes. She did have a shirt.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: But what she didn't have was her boyfriend who had the employee discount. She was not an employee.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: They spent so much time explaining this to her.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: And the cop said to the manager of clerks, do you guys want to press charges? And the manager of clerks says, I need to call the store manager. He needs to make that decision. And the cop turns to the lady, he says, go ahead and call the store manager. He looks down at the lady. Now I'm thinking this is going to be the end of. The end of it. He says, by the time she gets off the phone with the manager, if you have from now until that point to walk out, we don't need nothing, we need nothing. You free to go. No harm, no foul. They probably won't want to see you walk in here, but you've done nothing illegal. Once they say, press charges, I have to put handcuffs on you and take you to jail. He said, bail will probably be about $1,000.
A Walmart employee arrested a customer who wanted her discount back
You'll spend at least one night in jail. You'll have this on your record. you're already getting this other charge and this other charge that happens if you don't walk out of the store.
>> Darin: Which in my opinion is worse than not getting a discount.
>> Mike: So now this, this is not a, produced video, this is body cam footage. Yeah, right.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: But the angle that he's talking to her, you can see the door she needs to walk out of.
>> Mike: She literally stands up, walks three foot three paces and she's out of the store. And she says, but I just, I want my discount for another 10 minutes while they're going back and forth and it's the way they edited the video, you can see the lady talking to her manager and she comes around, says, he wants to press charges, she needs to get. And then the cop starts arresting the lady. She starts freaking out that she wants her discount.
>> Darin: Right.
>> Mike: I say all that to say for 30 minutes this cop was trying to explain to her, if you walk out that door right now, right now, you can go. If you don't, I'm going to arrest you. And she had a breakdown when they put her in the car handcuffed. But there's also a very good chance because I've watched a lot of these Videos of just general dumbness, like stupidity.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: So coming back to your Walmart story. Yeah, it could be that. So that story sounds stupid to you and me. You told it on this stupid podcast.
>> Darin: So clearly you think ever.
>> Mike: But they. Corporate Walmart may have said, you know what? We're just going to have people walking around and when they get asked a question, hold the phone up and say, speak M. Or, yeah, take the customer somewhere in the store, point at a sign.
>> Darin: Huh?
>> Mike: Say what you think it says and walk away. That's your two things that you have to do to be an employee here. And that probably. It probably loses some of their smarter customers. But let's be serious, smart customers are not going to Walmart anyway.
>> Darin: Not this one, no.
>> Mike: So I think it's a winning strategy. I mean, it causes you to spend half your afternoon looking for a thing. Think of all the money they saved in training, in hiring competent people and being able to parse words and form sentences.
>> Darin: What's fun? Parse words.
>> Mike: Yeah. What's funny was, I've been reading this.
>> Darin: Year is, we were all out. I dropped Livia and the kids off at the house and said, I'm going to run out to Walmart and do this thing for mom real quick. and I end up being there way longer. And Libby calls me and she's like, what's going on? I'm like, oh, you have no idea. And I'm telling her, and she's like, can you just. Can you tell me when you get home? Okay.
>> Mike: Yeah. Walmart has become the new Big Lots. You remember Big Lots?
>> Darin: I do remember Big Lots.
>> Mike: Do you remember when it was called Big and Small Lots? It used to be called that.
>> Darin: No, it's always been called Big Lots.
>> Mike: No, we had one in Huntington that was called Big and Small, and Small was in small letters in Johnson City.
>> Darin: When they opened it, it was Big Lots.
>> Mike: Okay.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: So there. I remember going there with my mom when I was a kid, and the. I watched a man walk down the deodorant aisle, grab a deodorant, use it on his armpit, and put it back and put it back. And I told my mom and we went back over. I was like, look, he used it and I pulled the thing off and there was a hair on it. Yeah. Walmart. So Walmart has become the new Big Lot. If you go into Walmart. Uh-huh. You'll see just, like, pulled out of boxes. Like, people will try things and just leave them there.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: You could get hit by a football Being thrown by a kid somewhere back in the. In the toy area. It would not surprise me to hear a chainsaw fired up over in the house. Or the. Well, housewares. Yes. The garden center.
>> Darin: I don't think.
>> Mike: I don't think Walmart's ever gonna think they're ever gonna sponsor this podcast. I don't think anybody from Walmart listens to this podcast. They've probably got a Walmart employee right now holding their phone up to the other phone, and they're just saying, speak, speak, speak.
>> Darin: This has been fun. This.
>> Mike: This has been a good one.
>> Darin: I really. Well, I mean, I enjoy all of them enjoy this. Been really good one.
Christmas is coming up. You need to buy Irritable Dad Syndrome items
So. Hey, guys, we want to thank you for listening. We want you to go to your irritabledadcenter.com and. Hey, hey, hey. Christmas is coming up. You need to go to our store on irritabledadcenter.com and there's coffee mugs and T shirts and.
>> Mike: Yeah, you guys don't have any good ideas to buy anything for anyone.
>> Darin: You don't.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: Nothing says I love you better than an Irritable Dad Syndrome coffee mug.
>> Mike: And for collectors. Yeah, there's some collector's items up there because we're too lazy to remove the old items.
>> Darin: That's true.
>> Mike: So one of these days, we will. So for now.
>> Darin: Yeah. Those irritable dad syndrome 2024 election shirts still there?
>> Mike: Yeah, yeah. The old logo shirts. Well, I think those have all been taken down. If you have the old, like, steel blue, logo. Yeah, I think those are all gone.
>> Darin: Yeah. And if you have one, bring it by Mike and I will autograph it.
>> Mike: Not really.
>> Darin: It'll double in value.
>> Mike: Yeah.
>> Darin: All right, we're gonna go. We hope to see you next week on Irritable Dad Syndrome.
>> Dave: Irritable dad Syndrome was videotaped before a live studio audience.
>> Darin: I had a point.
>> Mike: The magic of editing. No, this will sound stupendous on the actual show. You don't know what I'm talking about.
>> Darin: I did with Kirk and Kirk.
>> Mike: That's all like AI or something.
>> Darin: Yeah.
>> Mike: I don't know how.
>> Darin: I mean, it was, 35 minutes long, so I kind of sped through. Okay. It might as well be 35 with my attention span. It's. I mean, you know. Thanks for sending me Lord of the Rings.
>> Mike: Yeah. Taco Cat.
>> Darin: race car.
>> Mike: I liked Lady Killers, and nobody seemed to like.
>> Darin: I liked it.
>> Mike: It was a good movie.
>> Darin: I mean. Yeah, it was, Tommy Hanks and J.K. simmons who had Irritable bowel syndrome.
>> Mike: I'd rather have a piece of cake any day of the week.
>> Darin: Yeah, I have a problem with raw cookie. I have a problem with sweets, period.
>> Mike: I'm going to enunciate this, and that's it.
>> Darin: Oh, you're gonna enunciate tonight.
>> Mike: Don't do that.
>> Darin: What? You started it. Now, you watch your language. If you want, Pop, we can order it out of Bristol. It'll be about two weeks.
>> Mike: It will break your brain, and that's okay.
>> Darin: That's not hard to do.
>> Mike: Yeah, I, think that's terrible.
How's your car? What kind of car are you driving
>> Darin: Hey, how's your car? What kind of car are you driving? Do you drive out here? What kind of car do you have? What's the matter with you?
>> Mike: Straighten up.
>> Darin: No, tell me. What kind of car. No, no. What kind of car are you driving? What is that again? It's a what now?
>> Mike: A Trooper.
>> Darin: What kind of Trooper?
>> Mike: A Zuzu.
>> Darin: A Zuzu Trooper.
>> Mike: How are you paying? Yeah, I know.