Irritable Dad Syndrome

IDS #223 - A Phone Call From Tony Danza

Mike and Darin

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🎙️ Exciting news from the latest episode of "Irritable Dad Syndrome"! 🌟

We had a hilarious time discussing everything from recording mishaps to the quirks of podcasting. Mike and Darin dive into basketball tryouts, political surprises, and even the oddities of grocery shopping. 🏀🗳️🛒 Plus, we brainstormed a unique charity idea involving a bread tie necklace! 🥖📿

Your hosts, Mike and Darin, keep things lively with their witty banter and relatable stories. Whether you're a longtime listener or new to the show, this episode (#223) is packed with laughs and insights.

Tune in now and join the fun! 🎧

#Podcast #Comedy #IrritableDadSyndrome #BasketballTryouts #PoliticalTalk #GroceryShopping #CharityIdeas #FunnyStories

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>> Mike: Now. Now we are recording.

>> Darin: Okay. Is that very important that we record?

>> Mike: We have. Yes, that's.

>> Darin: I mean, what we talk about is essential to this podcast. But getting it on tape, it's not in memory. Yeah.

>> Mike: I finally got you on one of those. Oh, what you always get me. I'm like, I, need to tape this. And you're like, tape finally went the other way.

>> Darin: That was the joke. Yeah, that was the joke.

>> Mike: Yeah. start making more sense, we're gonna have to put you in a home.

>> Dave: Welcome to irritable dad syndrome. Now, in a convenient resealable bag, please welcome your hosts, Mike and Darren.

>> Darin: Hi, I'm Darren.

>> Mike: I am Mike.

>> Darin: Welcome to irritable dad syndrome. This is episode 223.

>> Mike: Strap in, kids. This one's gonna be a funky one.

>> Darin: Yes, it is.

>> Mike: we have this episode. You said 223.

>> Darin: 223.

>> Mike: So people don't like it when we talk about episode numbers, right?

>> Darin: Why?

>> Mike: They get upset.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: we've had ones of fan mail against that.

>> Darin: What is upsetting about that?

>> Mike: Stop talking about what number of episodes you're on. Stop talking about all this. You just get to the meat.

>> Darin: Okay, well, we're doing that now.

>> Mike: Get to the meat of the episode, and that's what we're gonna do. If nothing else, we're going to.

>> Darin: You won't hear me say 223 anymore tonight.

>> Mike: I. We had feedback years ago.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Someone complained that we should be funny within the first two minutes.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: Then it was crickets.

>> Darin: And you never let that go.

>> Mike: And never let it go. And then we had another feedback, not necessarily for our podcast, but for a podcast that said, quit talking about what number the episode is and how many people are listening. Just talk about your stuff.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: So here we go.

>> Darin: Here we go.

>> Mike: Yeah. How you doing?

>> Darin: I'm doing pretty good tonight. One of the things I'm going to talk about is the cost of milk and why they can't make it easier for people to buy it without having.

>> Mike: To do math for me, longtime listeners will remember we had an episode called the Blankety Blank Basketball league of America.

>> Darin: Yep.

>> Mike: that's where I was talking about one of my son's basketball teams, my other son Charlie. We had a basketball incident this past weekend.

>> Mike: So this is part two. Part two of the blankety blank basketball league of America.

>> Darin: Okay, before we get into the fun, Mike and I, we do this podcast from Westchester, Ohio. And Westchester is about 40 minutes, maybe a little bit more, from a town in Ohio called Springfield, where the Simpsons is filmed. There's a Springfield in every state.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: This particular Springfield, Ohio, made international, global news. And we never talk about politics, but my God.

>> Mike: But we're allowing it.

>> Darin: And I know that you know, this podcast, we recorded in advance, so by the time you hear this, it's going to be a week and a half, maybe more. And, you're going to be really, really, really tired of hearing about the dogs and cats being eaten in Springfield, Ohio, per reports. But our perspective on this is, hey, what happened? Seriously? Springfield gets put on the map for this?

>> Mike: For that. Yeah. So, first off, I have comedian.

>> Darin: Friends who live in there, and their minds are blown. Like we're international all over the globe. Springfield, Ohio.

>> Mike: So boo bot and Marvel's, by the way, are in witness protection.

>> Darin: Mike has two dogs.

>> Mike: Yes. They are under lock and key. I'm sorry. I have an undisclosed number of pets. I m don't want them to know.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: And I don't want them to know the number.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: that's smart. Bleep as you have to, but don't edit a word out.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Like Darren said, we haven't gone political.

>> Darin: No.

>> Mike: and we had a board meeting before this episode.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: At this point in our show's life.

>> Mike: With what happened this week, let me put this into perspective, okay? This is like having a podcast that talks about music.

>> Mike: But refuses to discuss Taylor, Swift, or I was gonna say rock music.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And then Ac DC comes to town and plays their final concert.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: And this pot. This is a terrible example.

>> Darin: It is.

>> Mike: This is a terrible example. I'll just say it for what it is.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: This is like having a podcast where you say you don't talk about politics, and then you have the former president of the United States come on and say they're eating cats and dogs in a town near where this podcast is recorded.

>> Darin: Right. I thought I had fallen asleep while watching it and then woke up and was dreaming. I actually looked at my wife because mom m came over and Cameron was watching it with us, and I looked at Liv, I said, what the hell happened?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Cause it. It came out of nowhere. It just.

>> Mike: And again, we apologize. We know you're sick of hearing about it. but my God.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: For our patrons, for our twitch viewers who are with us live just a couple days after it happened. Right now, as we sit here, it's fresh and m steaming and on the side of the road, and someone needs to put it in a baggie, tie it up and throw it in a nearby trash receptacle.

>> Darin: Hang it in Mike's tree.

>> Mike: Yes. Throw it. Sling it in the tree.

>> Darin: It was rich.

>> Mike: It was an exciting something that I.

>> Darin: Don'T think we'll ever see or hear the sights of that again.

>> Mike: I will say this, and I know this has been trodden.

>> Darin: We're never going to hear the sights of that again.

>> Mike: I know exactly what you said. I will say this. I've watched most of the presidential debates in my lifetime that have happened when I think I remember seeing Reagan. That might have been the first debate I remember seeing on tv. Ah.

>> Darin: Was that the. You or. No. Jack Kennedy? No, that was Walter Mondale.

>> Mike: Yeah, that was, But I will say that. Say what you will about current candidates. It makes debate watching hilarious. I mean, we've got bingo cards now. Bess and I made popcorn. Our ten year old actually watched it with us, and he thought it was awesome.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. So it's getting people.

>> Darin: Usually you get, like, one zinger, two. Like, finally somebody said.

>> Mike: And they something.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: They stick out.

>> Darin: Right?

>> Mike: That's the thing. Right? There's always the debates where things stick out.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: What was it with the, Well, you just said the one that you're. I know you're no Jack Kennedy.

>> Darin: Yeah, that was, Dan Quayle.

>> Mike: And the other guy, whoever ran against. This is why we're not a political.

>> Darin: Ran against. Dan Quayle was, George Bush seniors VPN.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: And he ran against the other guy.

>> Mike: Who George Bushena ran against.

>> Darin: Jack. Was it Jack Kemp? Who the hell was it? I don't know, but anyway, he's Jack Kemp.

>> Mike: Jack just called Jack Kemp. These people don't care.

>> Darin: This isn't a.

>> Mike: This is not a political podcast. It's a comedy podcast. But at this point, politics has dove straight into. We didn't go there. They came to us, and. Son of a bitch, man. We've had. You've got to give it to us.

>> Darin: Oh, yeah.

>> Mike: Let's just pause for a minute.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: We started this thing in 2020. Yeah, September 2020. On, the first episode came the ripe fruits of COVID Yeah, we made it through that. We made it through January 6. We made it through all that stuff. We made it through the campaigns. We've made it through this point. We're not, What's that called?

>> Darin: Doing it?

>> Mike: Yeah, we're not. We're not political. Intentionally avoided anymore, because at this point, we're intentionally avoiding comedy gold. So we hope you all enjoyed the debate the other day. Yeah, I don't know if it will have happened by the time this episode airs. But I cannot wait for the, walls and Vance debate.

>> Darin: Well, I'll tell you. And then I'm proud of myself because I commented today, because someone was accusing one of the candidates m of having the questions given in advance. Oh, yeah, and twitch, I said, they're the same questions. Yeah, you talk about abortion, you talk about immigration, you talk about the economy, talk about foreign policy. You talk about things he or she said at a time. There's, like, eight topics. Yeah, maybe nine if the moderators really squeeze them in there. Hello. Yeah, and, like, so, how many questions do you need to know?

>> Mike: Yeah, those aren't the type of questions that it's like, you know. Yeah. It's not like they came on and said, well, you know, which episode of Dukes of Hazzard did Cooter show up in first? You're not gonna know that the capital.

>> Darin: Of Vermont is Montpelier. Like, how did he know? The only way he knew that is if he had the questions in advance.

>> Mike: Oh, my gosh.

>> Darin: Lloyd Benson was the candidate debating Dan Quayle.

>> Mike: We're not going to turn into a solely political podcast. No, but we're not going to avoid it like the plague like we have. We're just not. And if you enjoy what we do, m stick around.

>> Darin: And if I can be serious, go out and vote. Register to vote. Go out and vote.

>> Mike: Yes.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah. Vote several times if you can.

>> Mike: And, soon. Cause I want to. I want my dogs back.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: I want to. I don't know where Mubai is. In an undisclosed location, this portion of.

>> Dave: Our show is brought to you by whomper's all beef footlong hot dogs. Hi, I'm Dave lay. Are you tired of buying mediocre brand hot dogs that claim to be a foot long but in actuality are only around eleven inches long? That seriously pisses me off. It's like, hey, who you trying to screw here, pal? Get a ruler and measure it yourself. If you find a whoppers hot dog that isn't a foot long, they'll refund your money, guaranteed. That's right, whompers, America's favorite footlong hot dog. Get your whompers all beef footlong t shirt now@irritabledadsyndrome.com. now back to you guys in the studio.

>> Mike: Can I continue the blankety blank basketball league? That's a little story. So, okay, so this is not the same basketball league. I falsely pump that up. It's a different one.

>> Darin: It's a can do it similar.

>> Mike: So it was tryouts. Bess was sick. She had the vid.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Or something. An alien. I don't know. Something. She could not be. She could not do things. And we had to. Like, it was one of those where we're splitting up the responsibilities for the weekend, because here's a fun fact. Kids. If you don't have kids, when you are an adult and you have kids, you still have responsibilities. It doesn't matter if you're. If you're. If you're sick or you just don't feel like.

>> Darin: It's horrific what I just.

>> Mike: Or you're dead. It's. It's fine.

>> Darin: The point is, they get to have a weekend. They get to have.

>> Mike: The point is. But you don't really.

>> Darin: I love my kids.

>> Mike: I do.

>> Darin: I love my kids very.

>> Mike: I love my kids. I mean, I enjoy your kids. I don't love your. This is getting weird. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: I'm very fond of your children.

>> Mike: I'm fond of your children as well. Yeah. My point is. One of my points that I've come to now is that if you're sick, have you noticed? Let me ask you this, okay? When one of you is sick, is that the parent the kids want to deal with and mess with and talk to and all that stuff, or do they leave the sick one alone and go to the well one?

>> Darin: Libby could seriously. She could have a, railroad stake through her chest, and they would not come and ask me a question like, well, we gotta figure this out on our own.

>> Mike: So, long time listeners know that I like to sit at the computer and grind my camos.

>> Darin: That's slang for call.

>> Mike: It plays the vijay. It's not kind of weird slang. And then right next to that area is the stairs that go up to the bedroom. And Bess will be up there sick. One of our kids will come near the room where I'm at, scream up the stairs to Bess to come down and make them lunch. And I'm sitting right there. And she'll actually say, why don't you ask your dad? He's right there. And then they'll say, well, he's busy, or, you do it better. One of the ways in which she does it better, she cuts off the crust and the edges of the bread and doesn't give them any. I will cut off the crust, but I'll still be like, you know they're starving kids in Botswana.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: That could use this crust that you're just throwing away.

>> Mike: And they, you know, so they don't want to deal with my okay. They're like, I just want a crustless jelly sandwich. In Charlie's case, because he hates peanut butter. Oh, you've told me that this whole thing.

>> Darin: Jacob doesn't like peanut butter either.

>> Mike: Yeah. What was I saying? Oh, yeah. If you don't have kids, then you don't have to worry about any of this stuff. You can be sick. Do whatever you want. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. so basketball.

>> Mike: Basketball. So best was sicken. I'm taking Charlie to his basketball tryout. They have specific times. You have to be there for his grade. It was starting at eleven to 1145. I was given instructions. Charlie and his friend Jack want to be on the same team. And I'm like, well, you don't have.

>> Darin: You don't.

>> Mike: I don't have control over that. And then I got the. Oh, yes, you do. There will be a lady. M. And you'll tell her. You remember back when I talked about the fear and there was a lady by the rock that I had to go meet? Yeah. So this is a lady at the basketball league.

>> Darin: Was it the same lady?

>> Mike: Different lady.

>> Darin: Oh, okay.

>> Mike: In different mission.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Similar result. I get there and we get in the line and I hear some foreshadowing from another parent that we know from somewhere else. And I'm terrible with names and where I know people, so I'm just gonna leave it at that.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: But they say, this is going crazy. More kids have shown up for this than they were planned for. They're running, quote, very, very behind.

>> Darin: oh. Okay.

>> Mike: M. So then I see Jack's mom is there. She's just a couple people up from me and Charlie in the line. And I said, bess told me. And she's like, yeah, we need to make sure they get on the same team. She's like, I'll tell the lady. I was like. And I said, quote, is that the lady? And pointed to, a lady.

>> Darin: Right? She's a lady. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

>> Mike: She said, you're on the right track. She said, that's the one I'm going to tell.

>> Darin: Okay. It's like, okay, so you got a plan?

>> Mike: So we went through the whole line. We get to the lady, and the lady, the lady that she has already talked to, and I say, by the way, this is Charlie.

>> Mike: And I give one of those like, wink and nod things, you know, like, yeah. And she's like, oh, is it Charlie with Jack over there? Yeah, yeah, that Charlie.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So then she wrote in red pen, oh, Jack's name on Charlie's thing. She means they had Jack's name. You know, they had their names on there. So I'm like, this is gonna work.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So we go in there, and now there's no instruction past that. They say, go into the area where the kids eat lunch. And then right next to that is the gym where they're doing the tryouts. We go in there. All the kids have numbers. None of us know what's going on. Jack's mom is sitting there at the same table with me and Charlie and Jack. And she's like, when are you supposed to go? I was like, I don't know. I don't think they have the fifth graders in there I yet. And they're running really behind. So we'll just see. We're waiting. We keep seeing kids like, move at this other end of the table and file in. And then there's no comment about anything. And then a man stands up. Wait, who's already there?

>> Darin: Not a lady.

>> Mike: Not a lady.

>> Darin: A man.

>> Mike: A man, okay. Stands up and starts calling names. And I don't mean he just stands up. And he's like, Jason. Jason. I think it's Jason's dad. Looking for Jason.

>> Darin: Right, right. Okay. A reasonable theory.

>> Mike: And then he pulls up a clipboard. He has a clipboard. Oh, he looks at it. He's like, Jason. And he said the last name. Then he stopped. He's looking around. And then he said, charlie. Charlie. And I'm like, and me and Charlie are looking at each other. And then he said, Jack. Is there a Jack here?

>> Mike: Jack. Jack. Then he goes on to the next name.

>> Darin: Was nobody answering him?

>> Mike: No. All the parents, we were all looking at each other like, why didn't you? I stood up. Oh, I stood up.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I went over to this man.

>> Darin: Of course he's gonna keep saying names if nobody's saying anything.

>> Mike: Now get this in your brain. This is a large room. This is where the kids eat lunch. I'm walking from where all the parents and kids are, this room up to this man who's just randomly calling out names with no explanation. And I go to him and he turns his back to me and he's calling out another name. You know, Michael. Michael, Jonah. Jonah. Deserve Jonah. Chuck. Chuck. Just doing that over and over. And I say, excuse me. Nice. Excuse me.

>> Darin: Denise.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah. A ronin. Hey, I see. Excuse me. And he said, I haven't, I'll call the name. I'm like, but okay, you did say Charlie.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: And my son's name is Charlie. And there's another Jackie. I didn't call Charlie. He's like, I think you did. It's a different Charlie. I was like, okay, well, how the.

>> Darin: Hell should I know?

>> Mike: You didn't call the last name, right? You just said, well, he was. He was a different Charlie.

>> Darin: Okay, well, how does he know?

>> Mike: Because you haven't told him. Exactly. Exactly.

>> Darin: I'm sorry.

>> Mike: The X Files music is starting to play in the back of my head while this is going on. I don't know what's happening. And he said, I will remember Charlie and Jack, and I'll call them when it's time. And I go, and I sit down. Jack's mom leans forward, says, what happened? I was like, he's just. I don't know what's happening. He's just calling names. He said he'll call. And then I hear Charlie, Jack. And then Charlie and Jack are looking at me, and I'm like, just go. Just go up there.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And, like, really? Now we're in this thing? Really? Do I go? Do I go? Do I not go? Do I go? Do I go? No, I go. Do I go? They went up there, and then he told him where to sit. And then other parents looked at me like I had solved the, you know.

>> Darin: The mysteries of the universe.

>> Mike: It was like the river. Indiana Jones in the last crusade.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: When he actually chose the correct cup, and he drank and he didn't die. And I, the way all the people still left alive looked at him.

>> Darin: But in Latin, Jehovah starts with an I.

>> Mike: Exactly. That's what I felt like. And then it was like, as names were called, then kids started standing up and walking over.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: And I got progressively more pissed. I was like, how many kids were we gonna go through before somebody went up and said, what the were you doing?

>> Darin: Cause it's like, are you calling names that are picked for the team or names that aren't? Because I have been, at a place, I think it was with, it was either band or choir tryouts or something like that. And they called eight names. And then these were the kids who went home.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: And I'm like, that's cruel.

>> Mike: Yeah. Let's start with a list of those who suck horrible.

>> Darin: And that's been in. You know, they've done that in movies too.

>> Mike: Ah.

>> Darin: Step forward. You guys can all leave.

>> Mike: So, listeners, I think I talked about Charlie having basketball tryouts in the glop episode. Yep, this is the second.

>> Darin: Oh, and that was a good episode.

>> Mike: We go in there and one of the coaches from those tryouts, remember I said none of them were looking at Charlie when he did anything, right? Charlie would do amazing things, and the coaches would, again, would all be looking the different way. And then they would look at a kid, and the kid would like, not Charlie or like, a kid would miss or whatever. Then he'd turn around, look at another kid, and then this kid would start making threes. It was like every kid they looked at, as soon as they looked at him, he would start missing everything. We went through that whole thing again. So Charlie is on one of the teams, and my assumption is with Jack. But my point is, this has been a podcast that's been around for four years at this point. I've had two kids go through this basketball thing, and two podcast episodes have had a story about the basketball, setting this whole thing up, where I'm like, what in the hell is happening here?

>> Darin: Right?

>> Mike: What are you guys doing?

>> Darin: It's not that hard.

>> Mike: Just have a sign on you that says, I'm calling names that need to.

>> Darin: Sit at this table or, you know, hey, parents. Okay, I'm gonna call the names. If I say your son's name, just send them over to me.

>> Mike: Yeah. And if you call, I'm one of.

>> Darin: The stupidest people in the world. And I figured that out.

>> Mike: Some would say that Charlie's a relatively common name. Relatively, yes. So if you call, as is Jack, if you call a Charlie, and then a dad comes up to you and says, I think you called Charlie, your first response shouldn't be. Not your Charlie. A different Charlie. You don't know who I am. You don't know who he is. Right. You just know you got two charlies.

>> Mike: That's it.

>> Darin: You know what? They should have had a head to head Charlie versus Charlie, one on one basketball competition.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: A game of horse or arm wrestling, cage match, whatever.

>> Mike: Whatever needs to happen.

>> Dave: You are listening to irritable dead syndrome now with more bacon.

>> Darin: Last week, Libby and I, we went downtown Cincinnati. Okay?

>> Mike: We went. Yeah.

>> Darin: The natty Cincinnati, as some folk call it.

>> Mike: I had a teacher in high school called Cincinnati Cincinnati.

>> Darin: And one of the things that we were talking in Mike's kitchen before we came downstairs to do this, there is a town across the river called Newport, Kentucky, and I. And they have Newport on the levee, which is a giant shopping center. It has a mall and has all these restaurants. And they hang their hat on the fact that you can come to their restaurant and see a gorgeous view of downtown Cincinnati. And I'm surprised that Newport doesn't just do that on their tourism. Come to Newport and see Cincinnati.

>> Mike: Yeah. It's like inviting someone to your house to look at the mansion across the street. Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Anyway, we went downtown, and we.

>> Mike: I'm not saying that Newport's a house, but if someone says to me, well, is Newport the house? I would agree. Kentucky.

>> Darin: excuse me. So we're going to the buddy walk. Okay. And the buddy walk is a walk that raises money and awareness for people with down syndrome. We're going down there. I haven't been downtown in a while, and, I was unfamiliar with where to park close to this event, where the walk is.

>> Mike: Where was the walk?

>> Darin: It was at smell park. Anyway, we found a parking garage. I prefer to park in a garage than try to find someplace on the street. I would just much rather park in the garage.

>> Mike: So you know where your car is? That's me.

>> Darin: Yes. Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: Just in there.

>> Darin: So we park in this garage, find a space very quickly, very easily, and then, we start walking to smale park. Really? We walked a long way. I could have parked much closer. I lost track of where I was. Anyway, so we do the buddy walk, and it's great. We're having a good time. We're done. We walk back, and we get to the car, and we're trying to leave this parking garage. And the point of my story is, have you ever told a joke that just totally goes over somebody's head all the time? Because, yeah, this really, really happened. We're in the parking garage, and I pull out and I go to the entrance, where I pulled in, and I was going to exit there also.

>> Mike: One, would think that's what you do.

>> Darin: Blocked off. Oh, it is completely blocked off. There's nobody there. The gate ain't gonna open. And it's also blocked off, like, okay. So I backed up and drove around and around and around, and I find another entrance slash exit.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: Also blocked off.

>> Mike: My question is, what the hell?

>> Darin: We're concerned now.

>> Mike: Yeah, I've read a, there's a Reddit horror story about a parking garage that you can't get out of.

>> Darin: Well, there's an episode, seinfeld, where they couldn't find that tree.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: So we're driving probably, I would say, ten minutes in this parking garage.

>> Mike: Around and round and round parking garage.

>> Darin: And we finally found one there, there. That has a guy. So we pull into that, and, I'm trying to put my ticket into the thing. He waves at me meaning give him the ticket. Yeah, I gave him the ticket. And I say, we've been driving around for, like, ten minutes trying to find a way. I didn't think we'd ever get out of here. And he said, $7. I gave him my credit card. He hates his job. Yeah, $7, that's his, no. Oh, yeah, yeah. We close off those two because it's.

>> Mike: That's how Mike Ehrman trout got his start.

>> Darin: I know.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And he wasn't happy with it.

>> Darin: Paul Saul. No.

>> Mike: You reminded me of a story that I never told on here, and it just happened a few months ago. The getafest. I went to get a fest.

>> Darin: Do you like Getta?

>> Mike: No.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: But Fancher does. it was when he was in town.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: So I went to go.

>> Darin: Getta is basically sausage and oatmeal, am I right?

>> Mike: Yeah. And sawdust. And I think cuticles.

>> Darin: Tweezers. Cuticles. Cuticles is so much funnier than tweezers. I wish I'd said cuticle.

>> Mike: Earwax. Here's all. Everything's in there.

>> Darin: Well, you fry it in earwax.

>> Mike: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Well, for the traditional method of if.

>> Darin: You'Re from Cincinnati, you do it that way.

>> Mike: So I parked in the Newport parking, garage, you know, right there where you connected. All so you can look at the city.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: I had to get out of there to actually, it was to take Charlie to one of his tryouts, a, game or something. I had to be home to get Charlie in time to go to a game or something. And I left when there was like. It was like a half hour left, you know, half hour window.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: And I get in the parking garage and it is at a standstill. So this parking garage is one of those where you pay before you go to your car. So you have a ticket that lets you out.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Right.

>> Darin: Yeah. You pay inside the shopping center thing.

>> Mike: Yeah. And the reason they do that is so that the parking garage will empty faster that you don't have at the thing. Trying to take my car.

>> Darin: I don't have any chance.

>> Mike: Is it quits of QR code that you don't have to deal with.

>> Darin: I was driving all around, and I couldn't find a way out of here.

>> Mike: It's a modern method that I think is perfect. Putting the dip outside of the flow.

>> Darin: I agree with you.

>> Mike: Yeah. So what's the holdup? Why am I sitting here for 20 minutes?

>> Darin: Damn.

>> Mike: 25. I forget what it was. There's a whole text thread between me and Bess that got progressively more and more cussy with me losing my mind, stuck in this parking garage.

>> Darin: I like the word it.

>> Mike: And I get to the end where I can finally see, you know, that glorious moment where you can see the light outside and you see, this is how I get out. and what do I see but a parking attendant leaning down, taking people's cards, feeding it into the machine.

>> Darin: What's that?

>> Mike: Doing the transaction for them and then giving them the receipt.

>> Darin: Why?

>> Mike: And my first thought was, how? Why? Why are you here?

>> Darin: Why?

>> Mike: My second was, did I just, is this now I have to pay twice. I get up to him and I hold him the ticket and he's like, oh, you've already paid?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And he's like, just took the ticket and it opened and left. And I said, and I quote, you gotta be kidding me. As I was driving out, not at him.

>> Mike: But just in general because I was stuck there for so long, because that many people didn't follow the signs. Y'all who aren't from around here. M when you're in Newport, in Newport, and for about a half a mile outside of Newport, every 10ft is a sign saying, pay your ticket before you get in your car.

>> Darin: You morrow.

>> Mike: It's over the urinals.

>> Darin: Yes. It's in the movie theater.

>> Mike: There's biplanes that are riding it in the sky. Nicole Kidman talks about it at the theater.

>> Darin: AMC.

>> Mike: Yeah, it's everywhere.

>> Darin: I had it mixed into my, ice cream cold creamery.

>> Mike: I got a phone call on the way to my car. By the way, did you, This is Tony Danza. Did you pay your ticket?

>> Darin: He needs work, you know, it's. Well, but he's a triple threat. Tony Danza. Yeah, he's the. Yeah, he was the boss.

>> Mike: Yeah, he was.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. Ah, anyway, you reminded me of.

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>> Darin: Last year, when I was hanging up Christmas lights, I was putting some on my, on my front porch.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: And I found a little trick that works really well to get the lights on there and to keep them on there, you can use bread ties.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: The little aluminum that on the loaf of bread.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So I started saving them. We'd get a loaf of bread, and I would save the bread dye. I didn't really think about it.

>> Mike: Right.

>> Darin: Last week, I'm going through my drawer, and I'm trying to find. It's like the junk drawer. You got a screwdriver, a flashlight, some batteries?

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: And I, knew that we had something in there that I just had to have. And I'm like, why are there so many damn bread ties in here? Yeah, I've got an entire sandwich bag packed full, like, probably a hundred.

>> Mike: These sandwich ties, you could do a craft.

>> Darin: I know. Oh, my God. Like, if I had died and my kids went through my house. Why does dad have all these bread ties? It's like the first sign of a hoarder.

>> Mike: Yeah. Ah.

>> Darin: Then I started thinking what I could do with these. You go to the airport, and you take your sandwich bag full of bread ties. And of course they're gonna find it when you go through security. And then y'all see you in hell, you won't take those. Damn it. Start, you know, kicking and screaming and don't know you're not taking those. And then I thought, what if I give them all individual names? There's all kinds of things I can do when I lose my mind. And I can't wait to do that. But I'm keeping the bread ties.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And I'm saving more bread ties.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I'm gonna see how many I can get before Libby or the boys say, dad, I think you have a problem. Cause if I can outnumber, like. Cause I've talked about my collection of sheer wine bottle caps. If I can get more bread ties and bottle caps, then, by God, then we gotta show.

>> Mike: Here's what we're gonna do.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: This is what I. And I'm dead serious. And you can edit this out as you need. I suggest you leave it in the.

>> Darin: That's what she said.

>> Mike: But whatever you feel like doing, I Want you to make a necklace from your bread ties.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: A nice one.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah. Oh, nothing but the best. I'll color coordinate it.

>> Mike: Yeah. And we're going to sell that on eBay, and we're going to connect it to the show.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I want some really good pictures of you with your bread tied.

>> Darin: And the money will go to charity.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just. Yeah, well, you could. We'll pick a charity, you know? Yeah. And we'll send a charity. I want to see if we can get an eBay bidding war for your bread tie.

>> Darin: Bread tie, necklace.

>> Mike: Bread tie, necklace.

>> Darin: Brilliant.

>> Mike: We're doing it.

>> Darin: Oh, yeah, absolutely.

>> Mike: I'm gonna pull out all the stops.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: My writing abilities.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: The. You know, a famous mm M podcast host, Darin Cox.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Three years of saving up. Classic.

>> Mike: Bread ties has made a one of a kind Show. Original. Oh, we're gonna beef it up. I want to see how far. How much we can get together for charity.

>> Darin: This reminds me. A few years ago on the Facebook, when I worked at Channel five, I had an empty tic tac box, and I went on Facebook, I said, free tic tac box.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: First come, first serve. And the first comment was, well, how much is it? I said, it's free. And then second person, what's the catch? There's no catch. It's a free tic tac box. will you deliver it? I'm like, well, where are you? I can. I mean, that depends. if you're far away, I can't do that. But if you're local, sure. And then I'll give you $5 for it. It's free. I mean, I had. And I'm very lucky. And over the years, I have fallen into a large group of people with very good senses of humorous. We got, like, comments in the hundreds, like 150 or something like this. And then a bidding war happened for it. And then people still said, listen, dear, and you haven't told me how much it is. It's free. Right. And I'm playing along.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I finally gave it to my friend Carly.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And then there was a hate thing against Carly because I showed her preferential treatment.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: Right. She was the first person who, you know, claimed it.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So I think that if we can get the same traction that that, tic tac box got, I think we can. I think we can.

>> Mike: I think this is a. I think this is a winner.

>> Darin: Money in the bank, license to print money, my friend.

>> Mike: oh.

>> Darin: One of the things I've talked about several times is I still listen to local radio. when I'm driving Cameron to school, I, usually listen to 92.5, the Fox kids radio.

>> Mike: is what happens when you turn your car on and you haven't paid paired your phone to it yet.

>> Darin: I can't pair my phone.

>> Mike: I'm. Because you. I'm telling the kids you screwed that up. Okay.

>> Darin: You paired your phone to my car.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And then now I can't pair my phone to the car.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And so you're like, well, I thought I, know you didn't. You like papa. Ah, let me limit. Let me show you boomer, how to do it.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So you get in my car.

>> Mike: I don't say it anymore. You just say it yourself.

>> Darin: Yeah. No, you got in my car and you're like, yeah.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: yeah.

>> Darin: let me try this. M. Why is it not doing that? Exactly. Why is it not doing that, Mike?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And you couldn't get it to. I need to divorce my phone from your car. So you divorced your phone from my car. And you, mister, I know everything.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: Still couldn't.

>> Mike: I came close.

>> Darin: You still can't pair your phone to my phone.

>> Mike: Don't you threaten me. I can do it.

>> Darin: No, you can't.

>> Mike: Came really close.

>> Darin: You tried and you couldn't. Anyway, I listen to local radio. I usually listen to 92.5 the Fox in the morning. They have Bob and Tom and any Morb. Like this morning, I was listening, and I swear I thought Tom was gonna jump across the desk and choke chick McGee to within an inch of his life. But he didn't. And then if I'm driving around, they listen to, classic rock. Okay.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: On, my car radio.

>> Mike: Fighters.

>> Darin: Yeah. Foo fighters, for some reason, are classic rock.

>> Mike: I was trying to be funny. Are they?

>> Darin: Seriously, they're playing foo fighters on there. And Pearl Jam and Nirvana. they're not classic rock.

>> Mike: No.

>> Darin: But here lately though, 92.5 the Fox is playing a lot of Iron Maiden and they played motorhead.

>> Mike: Well, Iron Maiden's on tour right now.

>> Darin: Yeah, well, they're playing a lot of heavy metal, classic rock.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And they used to stick basically to black crows. Boston and Aerosmith.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Now they're getting a little harder.

>> Mike: Hello.

>> Darin: My point is, my car radio tells you the name of the artist and the name of the song when it comes up. Right.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So a song was playing, I looked down at my radio and it said, slide it in by white snake.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I'm like, that's not. That's. That wasn't white snake at all. That was, It was somebody else. It's like the black crows.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay. And then I'm still driving.

>> Mike: Sounds black Crowe.

>> Darin: Yeah. It didn't.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: The next song comes on, and it hasn't changed. It still says, slide it in by white snake. A third song comes on, slide it in, white snake. It was on that for, like, two days. Every time I turned on my radio, I could change to 98.5. I could go to 135. I went back to 92. Five still, slide it in by white snake. It finally changed.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And the next song was let's get it up by AC DC. My radio station has got a dirty mind.

>> Mike: I'm just saying. I mean. Well, AC DC, 95% of AC DC songs are about Rian Johnson's balls.

>> Darin: But seriously, you go from slide it in to let's get it up.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah.

>> Mike: I just don't even know.

>> Darin: The story goes nowhere, but I still like it.

>> Dave: It's time now for the Kroger story of the week.

>> Darin: This is one of my biggest pet peeves. Okay. When you go to Kroger.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: Or you go to any grocery store, and I don't understand why they do this with the milk. Okay. Sometimes milk will be $2.99 a gallon. but the half gallons are $1.79.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay. So two half gallons costs more than a gallon.

>> Mike: Yeah, that's. Yeah. You buy in bulk.

>> Darin: I don't understand that.

>> Mike: It's a packaging price.

>> Darin: I don't understand why if. Let's say. Okay, let's say milk. Cause I'm tired of doing milk math.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: If milk was $2.99, let's just bump that up to $3. $3 gallon of milk.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: The half gallon should be a dollar 50. A peach.

>> Mike: Yeah. But you can't.

>> Darin: Not a peach.

>> Mike: A dollar.

>> Darin: Jesus Christ. The half gallon should be a dollar 50 apiece.

>> Mike: Yeah, but they want you to buy the full gallon.

>> Darin: Why?

>> Mike: Because it's less labor for. It's more expensive for them to make the half gallons than it is to make the full gallon.

>> Darin: Is that what it is?

>> Mike: Yeah. That's why buying in bulk is cheaper.

>> Darin: I don't get that. Yeah, I don't get that at all. Because, I went to the store and I was gonna. I usually buy two gallons of milk. Right. Okay. So this. But this time I'm buying one gallon of milk.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: But I saw that the half gallons were on sale.

>> Darin: They were a dollar 39. I'm like, okay, hold on, Darren. Okay, so, one gallon of milk is $2.99. Two half gallons at 1.39 apiece is with. It's less than $3.

>> Mike: Yeah. Okay.

>> Darin: It's lessen.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: But I had a coupon.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: For the gallon.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: $0.75 off.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So now I'm taking subtracting from the gallon. You're seeing.

>> Mike: You're thinking too much. Let me break this down.

>> Darin: I ended up buying the gallon with the coupon because it was cheaper than buying the two half gallons that were on sale. And I'm like, I hate math.

>> Mike: Let's. Let's break this down.

>> Darin: Okay?

>> Mike: Let's say I have a cow in my backyard.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Let's call the cow myrtle. That's a good cow.

>> Darin: Okay. And it's about to get eaten if it goes up to Springfield, Ohio.

>> Mike: Exactly. Okay, so, let's say you come to visit, and you say, I want a bowl of cereal.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: We take your bowl, we put cereal in it, we go out, we grab one of Myrtle's teats.

>> Darin: No.

>> Mike: What? And we.

>> Darin: Nuts. Straight from.

>> Mike: No, straight from the cow.

>> Darin: Oh, great.

>> Mike: It's the easiest way to eat it.

>> Darin: Right there.

>> Mike: Now you say, I don't want to do that. I don't want to do that. You don't want to go right. Straight from the teat?

>> Darin: I don't.

>> Mike: Right. So you want to package it in something? Well, the cheapest is just to empty out old Myrtle into, like, what, half a drum? Just. It take. It takes some time, but you just empty it.

>> Darin: I don't even know how much milk.

>> Mike: Let's just say, one, Let's say ten gallons comes out of Myrtle.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: All right.

>> Darin: If dad were around, he could tell me.

>> Mike: Yeah. So you have two five gallon pails, and you fill them up and you drag them in. Now, you use that to. Don't look at what they're typing. You got to listen to me. You got to stay with me here. Yeah. He makes a .25 gallon pails. Then you say, I just want a one gallon. Now, you have to have packaging for five one gallon things.

>> Mike: Now you want a half gallon. I have two half gallons for each one guy. Ah, it's more work. It's more labor to put that together to do than it is just more.

>> Darin: Out of the panel.

>> Mike: More math.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: You're paying. That's what you're paying for, is the packaging. M and the labor. And then there's also, the little, We don't want to deal with attacks that they throw on there.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: It's easier for them to produce the larger bulk items, so they'll give you a price cut on them.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: As opposed to all this little packaging that they don't want to deal with.

>> Darin: Do you want to know how stupid I am?

>> Mike: What?

>> Darin: I will tell you how stupid I am.

>> Mike: And right there, what stump says some.

>> Darin: Woodley two half gallons takes up more storage space than one gallon. M. That's where you had a higher transport price. Okay. When I worked at Winn Dixie, I worked in the dairy frozen food department. I used to stock the milk shelves. I used to do that all the time. You can fit four gallons of milk in one crate, and you could fit nine half gallons into the crate. And I was befuddled. I was like, what happened?

>> Mike: Huh? yeah.

>> Darin: How?

>> Mike: Yeah, it's like that chocolate bar problem where you take the one. Yeah.

>> Darin: And then finally somebody smarter than I am. Thank God Chester was there, told me that you got the negative space between the. In the four corners, and that's where you. Yeah, but I'm like, how do you get nine and here and four in there?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Harry Potter. That's how dumb I am, Mike. Now I'm so dumb. I'm the dumbest. My kids go, listen. God, dad, you're really.

>> Mike: I will tell you, you know, I work in manufacturing. We want to sell the biggest package that we can because it's the easiest to produce. It's the cheapest.

>> Darin: Yeah, okay.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Part of what it is.

>> Dave: This has been the Kroger story of the week.

>> Darin: Here's another story of how dumb I am. Last weekend, cameron was invited to a friend's house, and they were gonna play dungeons and dragons.

>> Mike: Oh, satanic kids call it D and D. Yeah. I call it Lucifer's, tic tac toe. What the hell?

>> Darin: That means Lucifer's tic tac toe. That's the title of the podcast. So I've got the address of this kid's house. It's 1068. And I'm on the street, and I'm driving Cameron there, and I'm looking, and on this particular street, the houses go. 1010-102-0103 00:10 40 what's the zero?

>> Mike: Four.

>> Darin: Where's the other? Where's one? Where's all the missing houses? Okay.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Why are they skipping? Because I've seen, like, odd number houses on one side, even numbers on the other side. That's very common.

>> Mike: uh-huh.

>> Darin: Huh? I've seen lots of houses. Many houses. You know, no one knows houses more than Derek.

>> Mike: Plethora.

>> Darin: Plethora. So many a plethora. I drive up to 1070, I'm like, here we are. And Cameron says, dad, this isn't his house. I said, cameron, it's got to be his house.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And he says, dad, this isn't his house. I'm like, cameron, look, we. You saw the streets. The xero four, 050-6070 let me.

>> Mike: Ask you a question.

>> Darin: I told Cameron, I said, your friend had to have texted you the wrong number. Never did. I think that maybe Darren was wrong.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: This kid clearly doesn't know where he lives. So this is. Not only am I stupid, but I'm a bad father because I said, just go ring the doorbell. They're home.

>> Mike: You're not a bad father.

>> Darin: Cameron gets out of the car. Yeah. And he's reluctantly walking up to the door. He doesn't want to ring the doorbell because Cameron knows that's the wrong house.

>> Mike: You're willing to send your kid into.

>> Darin: The wrong house to a complete.

>> Mike: Yeah, it's a complete.

>> Darin: Maybe they'll play dungeons and dragons with you.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: And he like, looks, shakes his head, starts texting and he comes back, says, dad, that's not his house. I'm like, where in the hell is his house? Yeah, because it's not here. It's just like Harry Potter again. The three and a third or whatever.

>> Mike: You just gotta run your car through nine and the three quarters, whatever. Yeah.

>> Darin: So Cameron texts this kid who clearly doesn't know where he lives.

>> Darin: And the kid tells us, where are you? And he said, we're on Blank street.

>> Mike: We're in Indiana.

>> Darin: He says, you know, blank street goes all the way around. It's like, you can go, did you go left on Blank street or right on Blank street when you came up to the sign? Right, left, you go right. Like, of course I'm like this stupid kid. So I back the car out and I'm driving. And of course if you go right, then you see six two six floor, six eight. Yeah, I told you that's where his house was.

>> Darin: And Cameron not, would never, never. Cameron's such a good kid. He never said, dad, I told you so.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: But you could tell that he had that look in his eyes. Like, dad's always joking about waving at cars, wearing his robe in the front yard.

>> Darin: It's coming sooner than later.

>> Mike: Yeah, there's a little there's a little list. There's a little checklist in their heads. Daddy's lost his mind, and you just went.

>> Darin: I had to go ring the doorbell.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: A complete stranger would come out.

>> Mike: That's what a dad does. You double down.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I never admit that I'm wrong. I'll fight to the death over it.

>> Darin: I thought this stupid kid didn't know where he lived. Why would you accidentally tell somebody the wrong house?

>> Mike: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Need a, nap.

>> Mike: Never. Vacation.

>> Darin: I need it. I think I have low sugar. I need to eat. I need a snack. Well, listen, guys, we're gonna go. We appreciate you listening to this episode, even though we started out political and hanging out to the end. God love you. Yeah, you're the best.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: You're my favorite listener of all time. We want you go to irritable dad center, calm and.

>> Dave: Hey, hey.

>> Darin: Go to irritable dads and calm. You can buy our political t shirts.

>> Mike: Oh, we got a whole one of them. I think it's pretty funny.

>> Darin: Irritable dad syndrome 2024. Yeah, yeah. Wear that when you go vote. See if they try to kick you out like they did when I wore my, I wore my vote for Pedro shirt when I voted one time, and they told me I couldn't wear it in there. You tried voting with your, the dude. yeah, yeah. Campaign shirt.

>> Mike: Yeah. And I'm gonna vote with my turd Ferguson one this year.

>> Darin: I think I'm gonna wear my. That's what she said. Scott and shrub. Yeah, that was his 2020.

>> Mike: So be on the lookout. Follow us on the Facebook sand. And be on the lookout for the debut of m, the first unique irritable dad syndrome jewelry.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: my bread charity.

>> Darin: My bread tie necklace. Yeah, I will start, working on that, too.

>> Mike: Boy, that's gonna. That's gonna turn some heads, change things. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: think of the stories you could tell people when you have your one of a kind. One of a kind.

>> Darin: What should we start the bidding at? What do you think?

>> Mike: at least a quarter.

>> Darin: It's gonna go higher. Like $5.

>> Mike: I know this. I go crazy.

>> Darin: Guys, we hope to see you next week on irritable dad center. Bye.

>> Dave: Irritable dad syndrome is a Mark Goodson Bill Todman production.

>> Mike: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

>> Dave: But wait.

>> Darin: There's more. There's millions and millions of people are listening to us live right now. You had no point.

>> Mike: Oh, I had an out of body experience just now. It left for the teams.

>> Darin: For the basketball teams. Son of a bitch.

>> Mike: It was tryouts. You ever had fun with this one?

>> Darin: Hold on a second. Snoop's coming to Springfield?

>> Mike: No, I'm confidently going on the record now that he was not.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Is not, will not. I wanted to have a more recent reference.

>> Darin: Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's the best, Tony Dan.

>> Mike: I should probably open up the rundown and start going on the planned path.

>> Darin: Thank God. I planned.

>> Mike: I do appreciate that you plan.

>> Darin: It keeps us from rambling.

>> Mike: You know. That's true. A lot of podcasts ramble.

>> Darin: I know. That's.

>> Mike: I started listening, honestly.

>> Darin: God, that's why a lot of people hate podcasts and there's no. Listen to me. There are so many people out there who hate podcasts that they will not give our podcast a chance.

>> Mike: True. When I was twelve. Yeah, I was thinking about this the other day. If someone had given me a ukulele. Listen to me. If someone had given me a ukulele and I had really applied myself, I think I would have a lot of money right now. I think I would have made a career. Career? Out of playing the ukulele. Yeah, it doesn't look that hard.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: It's only.

>> Darin: Do you realize how many ukulele players that you just offended? All two of them.

>> Mike: I don't care. I don't care. I'm damn near 50. I have a marginally successful podcast and, a cut thumb. I don't care.

>> Darin: Where are you going with this ukulele thing?

>> Mike: Nowhere. I had three things in succession I thought I could talk about, but they're not there. They have no comedic values. Oh, what you just watched me was curating memories. Yeah. Ah, no, no, no, folks, I do periodically not say something. so if you're like, all he does is just vomit whatever's in his head. Yes. But I do have some discernment.

>> Darin: It is nice. Know that occasionally you will edit.

>> Mike: I do. I do self edit. We should do that. We should have meetings with our patrons.

>> Darin: If they would come. Yeah, I would be happy to.

>> Mike: I bet half of them don't even know that they're still paying for their.

>> Darin: I swear.